Author's Chapter Notes:
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Gabriel found himself pacing as he awaited the news once again. Seeing all that blood on the bed sheets scared him enough and he drove through New York City at lightning speed as Salomi screamed in pain. It was almost 7am and he has been waiting for a little over five hours for an answer. Any answer. 8am….9am…10am…a nurse offered him some coffee, he refused and asked about Salomi’s condition but she had no idea…11am…noon…1pm…Ruth came by and waited with Gabriel, neither of them saying anything, she offered him coffee, he finally took it…2pm…3pm…4pm…Ruth had to close up shop and promised to come back once she could figure out scheduling for the club,he asked another random nurse how Salomi was, she didn’t know…5pm…6pm…7pm…Gabriel finally took a nap but it didn’t last long when he heard a baby cry, however the baby belonged to someone else…8pm…9pm…10pm… Gabriel was going crazy as he sat there alone, Ruth couldn’t leave the club, he was sure, he made himself another cup of coffee…11pm…12am…1am…Gabriel was staring at the wall, he thought he was seeing spots when a man approached him.
“Mr. Brewster?”he asked him
“Yes, is she alright?”he asked as he got up, feeling a sense of deja vu.
“Salomi Jane Squires…”he read slowly,”That’s your wife?”
“She will be,shes my fiancé, how is she?”he asked him
“Mr. Brewster, please sit down, can I get you anything?”he asked him
“No, I just need to know how she is please”
“I'm Dr. Neelson and I have been operating on your fiancé and your child”he said and paused, how was he going to word this? This was what he hated most about his job.
“Just spill it, just tell me, don’t tell me the doctor mumbo jumbo”he said, repeating Salomi’s impatient remark from a few weeks before.
“Alright…your fiancé had complications with the birth, her water broke in the middle of the night and she went into labor. However, since she went into labor 2 ½ months early, the baby went through a premature labor. Your fiancé went through a very tough delivery, there were times when she couldn’t make it, couldn’t do it but she survived through it. However, due to the complications from weeks before from the fall and internal complications that developed after, your child was delivered stillborn”he explained
“So the baby is here? Already?”Gabriel asked in disbelief, he wasn’t expecting to have his baby already! “Wait…whats stillborn?”
Dr. Neelson sighed,”Stillborn means….that the baby was able to be delivered but it wasn’t breathing when he was delivered. We tried our best to revive him but I'm sorry Mr. Brewster but your child didn’t make it. We believed that he died when your wife started to go through labor”he said as he put his arm on Gabriel’s shoulder. ”I'm so sorry Mr. Brewster, is there anything that I can do?”
Gabriel sat back and just stared at the wall in shock, he could see the spots again. His baby was dead. Gone. He never got to know him. “Just let me be”he said quietly. Dr. Neelson nodded and respected his wishes and got up. He told a couple of nurses to keep an eye on him just in case he went crazy or needed anything. But Gabriel didn’t, all he could do was cry. Cry for the young life that never got to start, cry for his mother because she went through so much pain and for himself because no matter how he looked at it, there was nothing he could have done to make it any different and that made him feel like the most helpless man in the world.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
Salomi slept for days, but she was breathing, she was getting better every day but slowly. For the first few days, she would wake and tell Gabriel and whoever else was in the room that she loved them and would fall back asleep. But one day it came all together, she knew where she was and it had to deal with her baby.
“Hey you”Gabriel said as he stroked her hair. He knew that she was only going to be awake for a couple of minutes but that was enough for him. It helped to take his mind off of his child.
“Hey…”she said to him,”How’s the baby?”she asked him
He stared at her in shock. No one had told her of course, because she was never coherent enough to understand the news. What was he supposed to tell her? “Well how are you? You were in a lot of pain”
“I'm fine, I’ll be better if I know about the baby”she said and then she rested her hand on her stomach and looked and realized that it wasn’t as big as she last remembered it. She could see her feet! “Wait….where…..where….where is…”
“Now Salomi just calm down-“Gabriel said as he looked around and tried to see if anyone was free. This was the moment he had been dreading.
“I wanna hold it. Wait….is it a girl? Ive always wanted a girl, a little me. Or is it a boy? Like you wanted?”she asked him. She then started coughing and laid back. Saying those few sentences wore her out.
“You need your rest baby-“
“Gabriel where is my baby! Our baby! Tell them I want our baby!”she shouted. Then the doctor came into the room. “There you are! Bring my baby now, I'm ready to go home!”
“Now Ms. Squires you need to calm down. You don’t need anymore stress”he said to her
“I wont calm down until I have my baby!-“
“Well that’s not going to work Ms. Squires because we wont tell you anything about the baby unless you calm down”he said to her sternly
Salomi sat there fuming. She looked at Gabriel like she wanted him to defend her but he stroked her hair lovingly as he always did,”Just listen to him Lomi. Please”he said quietly. He could barely look at her. She just sat there quietly.
He began to talk and she barely listened, looking toward the door for a nurse or whoever was assisting the baby. But then she heard the word ‘stillborn’. She heard that word before.”Wait…what?”
“Due to the complications from the fall and complications that developed after, your baby was stillborn. I'm sorry Ms. Squires…”
Salomi sat there in shock as Gabriel started to cry. She knew what it meant now, she remembered. Her baby was dead. Gone. A little being that she had been carrying around for 6 months had just disappeared. She knew this was going to happen, she knew that it would have come down to it being her or the baby. Now she really wished it would have been her. She was sick and tired of losing people she loved. She sat there in silence for a long time. The doctor soon left and Gabriel cried in her arms as she held him. She couldn’t cry, couldn’t speak. Silence was golden. Silence was her friend.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
“Is she still not speaking to anyone?”Dorothy asked as she walked up to Gabriel and hugged him. When she heard the news about the baby, she left the set and the movie as soon as she could. Its been a week now since Salomi found out about the death of her child. She hasn’t spoken since. Dorothy and David got on the first train that they could get on to New York. “How are you?”she asked as she looked at him,”Are you alright?”she asked him. He was sure going through a lot, he lost his first child and it seems that his fiancé has given up.
“I'm….breathing Dorothy. I mean, that’s good right?”he asked her
“Of course it is. Its better than….than anything else. That’s the best way to be”she assured him, not sure if she liked that answer. “Is it alright? Can I see her?”she asked him
“Yes”he said as he led her into the room. David waited by the door.
Dorothy walked up to the bed. Salomi was just staring at the wall. She was awake but it looked like she was sleeping with her eyes open. She barely moved. Gabriel hoped that maybe seeing Dorothy’s face would bring her out of her silence.”Hey baby. Its me”she said to her. She then walked up and hugged her. Salomi didn’t return the favor. “I know, I know. It took me a week to get here but finishing the movie was harder than I thought and then it took 4 days for us to get back”she explained but Salomi didn’t say a word. Gabriel and David left the room as Dorothy pulled a chair up next to her bed and held her hand, she saw her engagement ring and smiled,”My…that’s some diamond you got there….and that’s some man you got there, standing outside. Now baby, I know that you….it’s a shame what happened and don’t think it was your fault at all…don’t blame anyone….don’t even try to even think about any reasonable explanation about why….because we will never know. But we do know, especially you, know that the man that gave you this ring is dying because you have given up. This is a symbol that he wants to spend the rest of his life with you but….we don’t even know if you’ll last another week. You don’t eat, speak, move…we are just happy that you are breathing. Now you don’t have to speak to me…or to anyone for that matter until you are ready. But please give us a sign and especially Gabriel….to let him know that you will not leave either”she said and then started to cry,”Salomi I'm so sorry. I wish I could have been here for you…. but I'm not going to blame myself…I'm worried about you baby. I'm so sorry that this happened….I'm so sorry…but please Salomi, say something, do something, anything”she pleaded to her
But Salomi only stared ahead. Shes heard many speeches like this before. Ruth came in here everyday with new reasons why acting like this was wrong but understandable. She wasn’t acting though, she really felt like she couldn’t feel a thing. She was officially numb and just tired. She just sat there as Dorothy cried and then left the room and she just sat there as Gabriel cried as he sat by her side, like every other night, until he cried himself to sleep. Once he was asleep, she closed her eyes.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
Dorothy never liked hospitals, the last year of her mother’s life was spent in a hospital just like this in New Jersey. Salomi was sleeping and David had just left for California, she and Gabriel were sitting in the hospital room, just watching her.”Ok, we need to get out of here. You especially Gabriel. We need to eat something besides hospital food and we need some fresh air.What do you say?”
Gabriel only shook his head,”Its fine, you go. I mean she could wake up and if she doesn’t see me…I wanna be here when she wakes”
Dorothy nodded sadly,she knew he would say as much.She kissed him on his forehead and walked out as Ruth was coming in.”Is she awake?”Ruth asked her
“No…Gabriel is in there…I was going to get something to eat…talk some sense into him?”she asked her
Ruth nodded,”I’ll try but…you can take a horse to the water but you cant make the horse drink it” Dorothy sighed,she was right. Salomi will only speak if she feels the need to and Gabriel wont leave her side until he feels the need to, no matter what they say to them.
Dorothy went to a small deli across the street from the hospital, she kind of lost her appetite as she walked over. She only ordered a coffee and sat down at a small table near the window. She was lost in thought as she stirred the milk in her coffee and watched the many New Yorkers walking by. She didn’t notice a man staring at her and then approaching her table. She then looked up and smiled, she recognized the man but didn’t know his name.
“Dorothy Gibson?”he asked her,”Its great to run into you”he said to her
She shook his hand as she tried to figure out who he was.”I'm sorry…you are?”she asked him
He laughed in surprise, everyone knew who he was. But he noticed that something had to be on her mind if all she did was stare out the window for ten minutes while her coffee got cold. “Julian Brulatour….most call me Jules”he said
Dorothy smiled and then let out an embarrassed laugh. Of course! Jules was a huge movie tycoon, he was co founder of Universal Pictures, the adviser and producer of Éclair Studios and he even backed David with many of his films, including her film, ‘Saved from the Titanic’. She has seen him on many of her sets and has been introduced to him several times but they never actually exchanged more than a hello and nice to meet you. “Of course I'm so sorry Jules. I don’t know where my mind is these days”
“Its alright. It was a very surprising but humbling moment for me”he said to her,”Now that we got that out of the way, can I join you?”he asked her
“Sure go ahead”she said as she gestured to the empty seat in front of her.”So what brings you to New York?”she asked him
“Meetings, meetings…oh and more meetings”he said with a laugh,”I'm leaving tomorrow for California. I'm backing the next Chaplin film, very excited, its gonna be the bee’s knees”
“The bees what?”Dorothy asked with a laugh
Jules laughed,”Sorry, this young actress that I just finished working with, I don’t know if you have heard of her, Clara Bow…well she seems to be very promising, very beautiful…anyway, she has all this slang..don’t know where she learned it but…back to your question, ‘the bees knees’ means fantastic basically”he said and laughed
“Oh alright”Dorothy said and laughed,”Wow I guess I'm getting too old now huh?”she asked. She was almost 30 and she used to know all the slang.
“Oh your not old at all. I think Clara just makes it up but everyone catches on to it, she's quite the trendsetter”he said,”But you just finished a film with David correct?”
She nodded,”Yes I did. Its in post production now”she said as she put the mug to her mouth and drank the coffee
“I cant wait to see it”Jules said and then all of a sudden Dorothy spit out her coffee. He laughed in surprise,”Do you not want me to see it?”he asked
“No…my coffee is about 15 minutes old and very cold”she said,”I'm sorry that was very childish and rude”
“No it was funny actually”he said,”Let me get you another coffee and a sandwich”he said as he stood up and before she could object he was already at the counter. Soon he was back with a new coffee for her and sandwiches for the both of them. She apologized profusely for the coffee incident and soon their conversation went back to normal.”So, you just finished a film with David and now you are home…I don’t mean to pry but I watched you…seems like you were very deep in thought…”
Dorothy nodded sadly and he saw it. Something happened and that’s what distracted her. Again she left her coffee alone and didn’t take a bite of her sandwich, must be serious. “I came back because…a friend of mine…shes in the hospital…”
“I'm sorry to hear that”Jules said as he took her hand,”Is she alright?”
Dorothy sighed as tears filled her eyes, she looked out the window and quickly blinked them away, she then shrugged and then shook her head no. “No…shes not. I'm worried about her…shes been through a lot…and Ive been so busy…”
“Your not blaming yourself are you?”he asked her, not letting go of her hand,”That’s not going to help at all”
She looked at him and then nodded,”Your right but I cant help but think…”she then stopped herself. It wasn’t going to help, she left the hospital to clear her head and to get something to eat. She could think of every bad thought imaginable when she got back to the hospital. She sipped on her coffee and then picked up her sandwich and took a few bites.”I got back from California early this morning and I went straight to the hospital, I haven’t even been back to my apartment. I haven’t even unpacked. Ive been by her side…”
“That’s good”he said and decided to change the subject, it was all fresh and pained her too much,”So what are you going to do now? I mean this recent film is over, are you jumping into another one?”
“No. I mean scripts are being sent to me but Ive always been picky. David said that hes in the middle of writing another one…however the timing right now? I should take a break”
Jules frowned,”You aren't going back to London are you? I mean I'm sure you were wonderful doing Shakespeare but when you said that you weren’t going to do films ever again…I was saddened. I'm glad your back. Your really very talented”
Dorothy smiled in surprise. She almost forgot about the year she spent in London, doing ‘Hamlet’ with Lucas and putting up with him, then leaving on the Titanic…and where her life was now. “Why thank you. I didn’t know you were such a fan”
Jules blushed, which was very cute. “You can say that. Ive always wanted to tell you that but we never really got to speak to each other”he said to her,”I'm sure you had a good time there though right? Ive never been to London”
“Its very different and doing live theatre is very different from being behind a camera, yes”she said with a nod. She described her life in London and how hard but fascinating doing Shakespeare was.
“So…tell me…were you and that Lucas fellow…”
“Oh no. Everyone thought so”Dorothy said with a laugh,she hasn’t seen him since he left her after they docked in New York five years ago.”He was not my type”she said with a look on her face which made him laugh
“So what is your type?”he asked her and then stopped.”I'm sorry that was inappropriate”
“No its not…I don’t know what my type is actually”she said. She hasn’t been in love with anyone since Abraham. They quickly dropped the subject of love and talked about any and everything, they had been sitting there for hours when a man took a picture of them.She sighed, great.
“That’s a sign that we need to get out of here”Jules said,”Did you need a ride to your place?”he asked her,”You mentioned that you haven’t been home”She smiled at him and nodded.They got into his very expensive looking car and soon she was home, he bringing the bags in for her. She gave him a tour of the apartment and soon they were talking again over a glass of wine. It was refreshing, it was better than beating herself up at the hospital. He was very funny, so funny that she spit her wine out all over him when she laughed.He laughed,”I don’t know who told you otherwise but spitting is quite rude”
“I'm sorry”she said as she rushed to clean it up.Thankful that he wore such a nice dark suit. He smelled good too and she then looked at him, and he was very handsome too. Their faces were inches apart and just like in her romantic films, something took over and he pulled her to him in a passionate kiss
*___________________________*