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“Tell me about your husband.” I looked up at the woman, who sat down tapping her pen. 

“What do you need to know?” 

“You’re very closed up Xaen. I want to help you.” I scoffed. 

“You have helped me enough.” 

“Xaen, I want to help you heal. You are hurting.” 

“You’re right. But I do not have to share anything with you.” 

“So you choose to suffer in silence?” 

“Than talk with you.” 

“I see.” She stopped tapping the pen. She put her pen down on her paper and placed it on the chair next to her. She took off her glasses and sighed. 

“I am aware of what Txeis has done for a lot of people. I understand your hurt very well.” 

“Do you?” 

“Txeis ruined my life.” 

“Yet you still work for them. Must not have ruined it that badly.” She smiled sadly and sat back. 

“Xaen, you are so very bitter. It is so biting. Somewhere deep down, you are not like that.” 

“You know me so well.”  She kept quiet this time and just looked. It seemed that I had been turned to look the fool. 

“If you do not wish to talk to me that is fine Xaen. But I wish for you to be well.” I sat in silence for a long while before returning my vision to her. 

“My husband you asked about?” She smiled and gently nodded. 

“I will only disclose this bit…He was the love of my life.” My voice cracked and tears threatened to come. Such a touchy subject… one I was not ready to discuss with her. I did not trust her. Watching her pen pause one thing though was certain. Txeis had ruined her life. That story I would love to hear. 

“I’m sure he was.” 

“What happened to you? How did Txeis ruin your life?” She licked her lips and took a shaky breath. 

“My, I didn’t expect that I would be in the answering seat this session.” 

“Surprise.” She reached up and slid fingers through her hair. I scanned her every move. She was in fact a very beautiful woman. Light brown skin and dark silky hair identified her as of the Southeast Asiatic region. Her knuckles clutched her clipboard and behind her eyes lied pain. 

“Txeis has had some shortcomings with me but I will be very grateful towards their acceptance of me. Because of them I have a job.” She eyed the corners of the room. Cameras. Recordings. I sat back. She could not risk her job now could she? (Reena Ninan) 

“I see.” 

“That will be all for today Xaen. Thank you.” Her eyes looked down. Perhaps without the cameras she would be more persuasive. I sighed. I needed risk. If I was going to open up to her even a little bit I was going to need someone who wasn’t afraid to risk all. I got up and left. Who was Gael? He was the father of my precious son. He was my very best friend.

Tears fell down my cheeks and I hugged myself. Gael was apart of my soul. We would forever be connected and I would never take another man. I would remain alone for the rest of my life. Gael would forever have me as his. My hands came down to rest on my womb. Tarwyn… my precious little boy. How could a womb feel so empty and depleted? I had fought to keep him and he was such a strong boy. He had fought his way to survive, a spirit given to him by his father. I came in contact with my guard. 

“Time for the grub hall Xaen.” 

“Not hungry.” 

“You have to go.” I kept quiet as they tightened my cuffs. They led me in to the mess hall. 

 

 

 

*** 

 

 

“You know you have to eat, string bean.”  She glanced up at Gael who was walking up into their lot. 

“I’m not hungry.” She said, pushing away the fruit that her mother had set aside for her on the porch. 

“Why is that?” He asked, growing closer and closer. 

“Just not.” Finally, he had made it in front of her. 

“Ah, such a pity. It looks delicious.” 

“Gael,”  He looked up into the kind face of her mother, standing there behind the screen door. 

“Hello Ms. Aoura. How are you today?” 

“Fine. Yourself?” 

“Very well.” 

“What brings you by?” He glanced briefly at Xaen before meeting her mother’s eyes once again. 

“Just thought I would stop by.” Her mother smiled and glanced at him. 

“I’m glad you did. I’m sure Xaen is too.” She turned to give her mother a sharp look. 

“She is?” 

“Oh dear, my meat is in the oven. Wouldn’t want it to burn. See you later dear.” 

“Goodbye Ms. Aoura.” He turned and came to sit beside her. 

“Did rest find you peacefully?” He asked, staring out into the large expanse of the blue and white sky. 

“Yes and you?” 

“Quite.” 

“You aren’t going to the Corporation with your father today?” She asked, looking at him from the corner of her eye. 

“I should be there now.” 

“Why are you not?” He sighed. 

“I do not want to.” 

“Gael,” 

“Xaen,” He replied, looking at her with a simple smile. 

“You know that not going is breaking tradition.” 

“Ah so you follow tradition to the nine?” 

“I’m just saying…” 

“I always got the feeling of new from you. A woman who would break out of tradition and forge her own path” She snorted. 

“You got all of that from me?” 

“One of many things.” Suddenly, the breeze couldn’t come fast enough and she found that her cheeks were warm. 

“Xaen,” 

“Gael,” 

“Come with me to the festival tonight.” His boldness pleased her. 

“Me? Of all the pretty girls you choose me?” She teased with a smile. 

“You are the only one who can speak for me.” She blushed more. 

“And of all the girls there, you are the only one who would catch my attention.” 

“Why are you being so nice to me all of a sudden?” He stood up. 

“I’ve always been nice.” She laughed. 

“Surely you jest.” 

“Maybe… it is because I have grown fond of you Xaen.” 

“I see.” 

“I shall come to you tonight at 8.” 

“Alright.” 

“See you then.” She watched him walk away and soon down and around the bend until he disappeared. The screen door opened and her mother came out to sit beside her. 

“He is fond of you. Very much so.” 

“I don’t know if I should go.” 

“And why not? You are the only young woman his eyes will see. That he has made clear. And besides, this could be the time where you two really get to know of one another.” 

“Mother…. what… just happened?” 

“I believe Gael Choi just asked you to accompany him on an date.” Her face blossomed in color and her mother chuckled before kissing her forehead. 

“We must make sure you are ready for tonight. Come, let’s run your bath.” She got up. 

“Xaen?” 

“Yes Mother?” 

“Do make sure you eat that fruit. It is so beautiful to see you with figure. I will not have my daughter waste away.”  Grabbing the bowl, she started to eat the fruit as she made her way into the abode for her bath. Eat she would. 

***

 

 

“Finished.” The guards wasted no time showing me back to my cell. I sat in the corner of my bed and laid my head down on my knees. I was no longer his string bean. Our lives had been interwoven so intricately that now nothing of my former self remained. Even still, memories of the man I so longed for traveled through my mind like the wind. They were all that sustained me. My fingers itched to write my feelings but for now, they would be cemented within my mind. Gael was only thing still giving me strength. From beyond the grave, he still watched over me. I bit my lips. How I desired to go back. How I wished none of this had happened. If I could just remain safe against my husband’s chest, his arms holding me captive…I’d find the will to live. I laid down, eyes blankly staring at the grey slate wall. My will…had long since been gone. But once…it lived in him. It had been brought alive by the touch of his lips. But now an all consuming fire dwelled where once purity and love had lived. 

 

***

“What would you like to discuss today Xaen?” 

“There is nothing I desire to share with you.” The tapping began and I looked at the woman whose name I’d come to know. 

“There’s nothing that has been weighing on your heart?” 

“…” She sighed heavily. 

“How did the prestigious medical doctor turn into a criminal?”

“How you ask? Hatred. Heartbreak. Grief. All of which were bestowed graciously upon me by Txeis.” 

“And how did they grace you with these things?” 

“What lies beneath your surface I wonder. How long you must have worn your mask.” I watched as something changed in her eyes. She broke the contact and looked down. 

“…I understand that you have suffered…a lot of us have.”

“Suffering would be too kind a word to describe what happened to me.” She swallowed. 

“Even so… it is wise to allow someone to aid in healing. You don’t want that for yourself?” 

“What I want is to get even.” Patel lifted her eyes and fixed them onto my face. 

“I want to know how you reached this place.”

“Are you worthy of that? ”

“I simply want to help you Xaen.”

“Yet you are being monitored and cameras surround all four walls. How very careful you have to be Patel. I on the other hand don’t care what happens to me. I will speak the truth.” If she wanted to know… she would get her answer.

“What is the truth?” 

“It lived once inside my womb. It once existed between the lips of my husband. In a field of tall grass it dwelled there undisturbed.” 

 

***

The light from the lanterns lit up the night and the scent of iris and lilac permeated through the air. She swallowed thickly as she watched other girls her age walk past. Some of them wore dresses that revealed skin, their necks on display. Sure to entice. She, however, wore a dress once belonging to her mother. A white silk dress that touched the ground, the only skin shone was that of her shoulders, ornamented with jewels. The sleeves of the dress hung off of her shoulders and fell to her waist. Her mother had coifed her dreadlocks, lifting them up and away from her neck. Her face was bare except for golden shimmers which adorned her skin. A translucent gloss painted her lips and she nervously clutched her hands together. Eyes scanned the crowd, searching. Was he still coming? 

“Xaen?” Her breath caught in her throat and she slowly turned. Displeased that the man who faced her wasn’t him. 

“Aeris.” The way he looked at her made her stomach grow tight. 

“You look amazing.” 

“Thank you.” Her voice was robotic and emotionless. 

“It’s a pity you’re taken.”

“Why is that?”

“Gael doesn’t want to be with you. But looking at you now, I think he’s a fool not to want you.” Her throat grew tight and she clutched her fingers tighter. His gaze slid down her body.

“Don’t bother looking for him Xaen.” She stood up tall and held her head high. 

“Thanks for your advice. I shall heed it well.”  Without another word, she left him. When she was far away, un- expectant tears starting to well up in her eyes. Now, the lights had grown further away and in the still of the night, only the light of the fireflies could be seen. She sat down on the grass. This was a mistake. There was no way that he could reverse his feelings so quickly. Surely, this all had to be a ruse. Surely, he had an ulterior motive. 

And like a fool, she had played right into his hand. She knew it was all too good to be true. He wasn’t in love with her. Nor did she expect him to be. After all, they had been spoken for, their voices silenced in the matter. She let the tears fall down her cheeks. How humiliating. Even still, she was daughter of Zor and no one deserved to see her broken. Hastily wiping her tears, she stood slowly. He would not play her a second time. 

Soon the lights reappeared in view and she walked calmly, the blades of the grass rustled underneath her feet. Soon, she stopped in mid stride. There, up ahead, stood Gael. Eyes turned to meet a small group of girls that surrounded him. One in particular caught her attention. Paurel Zee. She was beautiful, pale skin glowing ethereally. Her body clothed in pure moonlight, every curve of hers accentuated. She had a hand on his bicep. For a while, she observed his uncomfortable body language. 

“I’m so glad you came Gael.” She purred, sliding that same hand down to his abdomen. He didn’t answer but the way he looked at her revealed his repulsion. She swallowed thickly and approached them. 

“I see you are here after all.” His eyes lifted and met hers. She allowed him a look as he took her in head to toe. 

“I was afraid you wouldn’t come.” He answered, gaze returning to hers. 

“You did invite me did you not?” 

“I did.” Paurel scrunched up her face as if something rancid had passed by her nose. 

“My, Xaen don’t you look quite plain. Don’t you know how fortunate you are to be invited by Gael to attend?” 

“I was not aware that the power of heaven and earth lied in one man.” She replied, her gaze set on the girl. 

“You are of marriageable age and yet you still look like a child. How unbecoming.” 

“You are quite right Paurel. I don’t have such ample features such as yourself. And yet, is it not I who speaks for Choi Gael?” She replied smoothly, her gaze chilly. The girl flushed red and gripped her fingers together.

“It’s a shame really. Such a handsome man promised to someone like you. You don’’t deserve him.” 

“Paurel,” Gael reached up and gripped her hand.

“I’ve had enough. Your presence makes me want to vomit.” If she could have turned into a tomato, she would have. She blinked, mouth gaping open. 

“C-come again?” He tossed her hand away as if it were infected. 

“You would do well to hold your tongue in the future. I and I alone speak for Xaen. Insignificant as you may be, no one will disrespect her in my presence. I care not who they are.” She shrank back from him, the other girls gasping. 

“I don’t understand…I thought you hated her! She’s not worthy of you Gael! She’s a simple country girl who doesn’t know her place! How could you defend her?” Before he had a chance to respond, she walked up to her and slapped her. 

“Perhaps the hole betwixt your thighs is so big and thirst so insatiable that you do not have ears. I don’t give a damn what you think about me. But, I will not tolerate you disrespecting my kin. Keep their names out of your filthy mouth!” She snarled, lifting her hand again as to strike her a second time. But before it could make contact, a much bigger hand gripped hers. 

“Xaen.” Her breath had grown labored, anger traveling through her body in waves. 

“She is not worth it.” He’d grown close, his breath a hair’s length away. She looked up at him, nostrils flared. 

“Gael…”

“Compose yourself.” She couldn’t stop the way her fingers gripped his nor stopped the hand that slid around her waist, pulling her flush against him. All the while, her eyes met Paurel’s. She watched the way he brought her arm down to her side, fingers still tightly intertwined. A blotchy red mess scattered across her neck as eyes took in the golden galaxy on her skin. 

“You…you actually love her don’t you?” Gael spoke not behind her, his breath falling softly on her shoulder. 

“Paurel…there’s plenty of other guys here…let’s go…” She was slow to turn but soon followed her friends away. For the longest time, she cursed her heart as it beat wildly in her chest. The intimate contact of his skin and breath upon her was making her light headed. The press of his male body against her had taken the feeling out of her knees. 

“You can let go of me.” 

“Am I required to?” His voice, now low in timbre touched her in places only her mother had seen. She broke the contact, pulling his arms away from her. 

“We’ve achieved our goal. Paurel is gone. Therefore, there is no need to remain in contact.” She turned around to face him. 

“What is your agenda Gael?” He tilt his head slightly as if he misunderstood. 

“My agenda?” 

“Why have you asked me here?”

“You asked me that before. I believe I answered it.”

“Refresh my memory.”

“I have grown quite fond of you.” 

“So suddenly?” 

“It has been a long tireless process trust me.” She watched him as he spoke again, his every movement under scrutiny. 

“I’m glad you decided to attend.”

“You are?” 

“Yes. I am.” She bit her lips.

“My mother spent a lot of time preparing me for you. She is hopeful for our union.” 

“The effort is very much appreciated.” 

“Gael,”

“Xaen.”

“While I was waiting for you earlier, Aeris came to me.” 

“Is that so?”

“He said a lot of things to get underneath my skin.”

“Such as?” She brought her gaze upwards. 

“He told me that you didn’t desire a union with me. How much of a fool you must be to not want me.” Strange that irritation flickered across his rather emotionless face. 

“I see.” How curious it was that the intonation of his voice had changed. 

“I understand that this is something unfamiliar to both of us. We’ve spent our lives despising one another for the decisions outside of our control. I understand also that what Aeris said is the truth.” His gaze grew intense. 

“Xaen.”

“Time and time again, we’ve been at each other’s necks. My parents have such high hopes for you and I. But, I would desire you be happy with a mate of your choice.” 

“Xaen,” His form grew closer. 

“With this expressed…I’m going to go home. I shouldn’t have come.” 

“You are very much mistaken. I have been intentional asking you here. This, being a choice of mine. Not by my parents.”

“No, everything about you and I have our parents written all over it. How fair is it to you being in bondage to me and I to you?” He grew closer as several people passed by them. 

“I’m not what you want. I’m plain and boring. I’m not in your league.” She could feel the heat from his body as he grew even closer, making her stiffen. 

“You’re wrong.” Those simple words sparked a heat to travel through her cheeks. Eyes met. 

“Gael-”

“Since when does the Xaen I know listen to minuscule little insects?” She couldn’t find words or escape his gaze.

“That’s so unlike you. I don’t like it.” 

“Who do you think you are?” 

“I am the man you will marry.” Anger suddenly lit up within her and she pushed at him. 

“I can’t waste any more of my emotion…on this.” Her legs moved before her brain had time to comprehend and everything blurred past her. She couldn’t take it anymore. The back and forth.. Did he know of what he did to her? How frustrating it was! Who was he to do so? The grasses swished around her, the breeze from the night picked up. Above, starlight lit her path. 

“Xaen wait!” Her heart leapt into her throat. Turning, she found him closer than she had anticipated. 

“Go away. Stop all of this!” 

“Wait!” She ignored him and kept going, past the fountains of Flora, said to grant wishes. Lifting her dress, she ran as far as she could until her lungs begged for wait. Gasping for the air, she let her head fall back. But, it was not air but flesh and blood which it landed on and she turned her head to find Gael behind her, breath just as heavy. The trickling of the fountain was faint and the night covered them. His hand stopped her, fingers tightly gripping hers.

“Why are you running?” He asked, gaze intense. Throat tight, she fought off tears. 

“Why are you wanting to pretend? It’s not worth it.” 

“I’m not pretending. I’ve been trying to show you that.” 

“I don’t understand you!” She said angrily, pushing his chest.

“Look at me Xaen.”

“Let go of me.” 

“Lift your eyes Daughter of Zor.” She gathered the remaining dignity within her and brought her gaze up.

“I haven’t been quite clear until now and for that I apologize.”

“Clear about what?” He pulled her closer. 

“Our betrothal.” 

“We do not have to be redundant. We both know it is meaningless.”

“Xaen, you’re not listening to me.” She remained quiet, gaze strong as she looked at him. The usual stoicism was no more. Instead, his eyes burned with something she couldn’t name. He held on to her with such tenderness, quite different than previous encounters. His hair, normally clipped short teased his cheeks, the strands a direct sign of rebellion. Under the glow of the lanterns, she caught a faint color there in his cheeks.  How breathtaking he was.

“Do you not know the reason I asked you to come here?” The tone of his voice caused her to shiver. Her mouth had long since grown dry and she found herself unable to reply. He let go of her hand.

“You have penetrated my thoughts and I have not been able to remove you.” He lifted his hands and caressed her shoulders, teasing the beaded jewels that hung across them. His eyes traveled down her body. Unlike that of Aeris, they left trails of fire that seemed to meet and conjoin in her womb. Desire…what her mother had spoke of.

“Even now, as the moon washes you with its light, I find you magnificent.” His words stopped her breath and she looked up into his eyes. Within the depths, she felt as though she could get lost. 

“You are beautiful.” She inhaled, eyes grown wide. 

“Gael…” He enclosed his arms around her, their bodies flush. 

“I want no one else for my mate. You will suffice.” She couldn’t speak and she remained still against him. What was happening?

“I don’t compute…” She whispered against his chest, eyes closed. His hand lifted and skimmed her cheek. 

“I grow tired of fighting what I cannot change.” 

“Gael,”

“Consider this to be a notice.”

“A notice of what?” 

“My pursuit of you.” Her legs had grown unsteady and she finally allowed herself to touch him. The firm muscles of his back met her fingertips. She inhaled his scent as he hugged her close. For the longest time, she held on to him and when it was time, she pulled away from him. Biting her lips, she glanced up at him. The timid boy she had known from the age of five had grown into a man who fearlessly and boldly spoke his mind. Her heart pumped against her chest but she spoke, voice soft. 

“Pursuit accepted.” He smiled and sighed, leaning down to press his lips against her cheek.

“Make a wish Xaen. The waters of Flora are listening.” She gripped his shoulders, cheeks hot. 

“I…I want to share a dance with you here…for the first time.” His hand came to slide around her waist and their fingers joined together. 

“Wish fulfilled.” He pulled her as close as she could get and gently guided her in a dance. In the quiet with no one around, the chirping of the cicadas served as their personal orchestra, the fireflies their audience. He felt so right, so good underneath her fingers. Sighing deeply, she smiled against him as they twirled to their own rhythm. Soon they came to a stop. Her arms tightly held him to her and she was sure he could feel her heart beating against his. 

“Make another wish.” He spoke lowly, watching her every move. She licked her lips. She gripped his shirt. 

“K-kiss me.” 

“You are aware of the consequences of this action?” She took a shaky breath. 

“I-I accept them…” That was all he needed. Reaching up, he let loose her hair, the strands falling around her waist. Sliding fingers through the fragranced dreads, slowly his lips came to meet hers. Her lips molded against his perfectly. Her eyelids fluttered closed and she sighed against his mouth. He explored her gently, without rush and the taste of him sent electricity sparking through her veins. His kiss sent her above the atmosphere into the stars. Sooner than she’d liked, his lips came away from hers, taking her breath with them. She couldn’t quite open her eyes yet, not while the earth still spun beneath her feet. Her breath was deep and cheeks ablaze. 

“Wish granted.” He spoke gently against the corner of her mouth. 

“I fear that I might fall.” He lifted her into his arms, cradling her to his body. Without another word, he sifted through the grass until the rushing waters of Flora were within reach. Placing her onto a stone seat, he pressed his forehead against hers. 

“Xaen…” His voice was whispery. 

“What is it?” 

“Now that I’ve tasted you I won’t be satisfied until I have another.” Her eyes opened to find his gaze on her. 

“Gael…” 

“I have never once contemplated being selfish before now.” His thumb brushed her bottom lip. 

“But your father will kill me should I act rashly.” She pulled him closer, only slightly. 

“We are to remain separated until we are joined.” 

“That is best.” Leaning up, she quickly pressed her lips against his, eager for another taste of him. One turned into many and they pulled away, breath heavy. The heat in her cheeks mirrored his. 

“The festival shall go on into the night. We should partake in it.” Biting her now bruised and tingling lips, she nodded. Fingers outstretched, waiting. Slowly, she pressed her fingers against his. He gripped them and pulled her towards him. Slowly, they came back towards the light, the music and the laughter of all of their peers. His touch pressed against her back. Eyes followed them and recorded every inkling of contact between them. Now, there was not disdain in her heart when she looked at him. But instead, there was a warm overwhelmingly big happiness. Now, he carried the word she treasured most on his skin, in between their fingertips and most importantly on his lips. It blazed brighter than the very stars. It read: Mine. 

 

***

“We gave Txeis everything. They took my reproductive system…our marriage….they even tried to destroy the love we had for one another. So many children we had created…they too took their lives selfishly. Txeis filled our young minds with false hope. We truly believed that we were making a difference…helping as many people as we could. But we didn’t know that in fact our hands, young as they were, were stained with blood.” Patel gripped her clipboard. The ceaseless tapping that irritated me had finally stopped and now she was at a loss for words. 

“Xaen…”

“You want to know the truth. I shall tell you.” 

“I…I think that is enough for now.” 

“Silencing me will do you no good. If you wish to know I shall reveal.” She looked shaken up, something within my words affecting her. Good. 

“Xaen.” We both looked up into the face of a guard who had come to collect me. 

“The warden would like to speak with you.” I frowned, Patel silent. 

“About?”

“You have been rewarded with good behavior.” My heart leapt in my chest. Very good. 

“I understand.” Standing up, I glanced at Patel. 

 

“Until our next meeting.” The guard grabbed my handcuffs and escorted me down the hall. Soon and very soon, I’d be free. 

 

***

“Faie?” Eyes glanced upwards to find a young woman standing in front of him. She clutched her hands nervously. 

“Tawn.” She inhaled and swallowed. 

“W-what are you doing?” He stood up. 

“What is it you require?” 

“Ah, well nothing really. I-I just wanted to come see you that’s all.” 

“I see.” Before she could say anything else, he turned his back to her. 

“If there is nothing you need, I will take my leave.” 

“Faie…” He could smell it on her. The desire to have him. It did them no good. He’d never take another woman.  He burned for only one. His eyes opened and met the sky. When he finally held her again, he’d let her breathe life back into him. He’d been dead for so long. 

“We move out in the morning.” He spoke, passing Avery. 

 

“Roger.” He’d cried enough tears. He’d remembered enough. Now, it was time to implement his plan. If it cost him his life, it was a worthy sacrifice. He would retrieve his wife no matter the consequence. 






Chapter End Notes:

.. <3 

D&L 







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