“So?”

    “So?”

    “What happened?”

    “Some girl tried to push up on June Bug and he got her together.”

    “That right? Them girls neva learned did they?”

    “Guess not.”

    “What Gam do?”

    “Went over to her and told her to leave him alone.”

    “That’s right. Gam shoulda punched her.”

    “Saffron!”

    “What? Gam was always too nice. Sometimes, you gotta get a lil mean for folks to understand you mean business.” 

    “Hmm.” 

    “Well, Gam’s all tucked in now and the kitchen all clean so what you say we get us a readin session in fore we go to bed?”

    “I’m okay with that.”

    “Alright then.” The girls went up the attic stairs but not before grabbing blankets, pillows and comfy duvets. They giggled on their way up. 

    “This like a sleepover.”

    “Mmhm like when we was little.”

    “Yeah cept Gammy not here to help us make our fort.”

    “That’s okay we make it nice and big jus’ for her.” As they got to the top and sprawled out the duvets, blankets and pillows. 

    “You bring the snacks too Tangie girl?” Fronnie asked, headin over to the journal. 

    “Yup. I got us covered okay? I know the drill.” 

    “Alrighty then let’s get this on and poppin.” They set up their fort and got it comfy just the way they liked it. 

    “I tell you what Fronnie…them girls betta leave June Bug alone else they gon see anotha side of Gam they ain’t neva seen before.” The eldest sister grinned hard. Fingers peeled the journal open and they were both drawn in. 

*** 

    I’ll never forget that night. It was a night of firsts. First jook joint. First skitchy yitchy dance.  First time feeling Joon’s hands, breath and body heat all over me. I completely understood why Mama told us to stay out of that place. Cause she called it ‘the devil’s playground’. But then, it wasn’t the devil I was dancing with nor was it the devil who made my knees near buckle. Little did I know then that the jook joint would be the catalyst for a lot of firsts to come in my life. Good and bad. 

*** 

    It didn’t matter that she could feel sweat bead down her back. Large hands gently caressed her hips and she was painfully aware of Joon’s very male body. Every sensation she felt was new and she tried not to show how much more of it she wanted. Parts of her were coming alive but then so were parts of him. He’d never been this close up against her before and he pressed his lips against the juncture of her neck and shoulder. 

    “You feel so good baby.” He said low and soft against her, squeezing her hips. Biting her bottom lip, she turned to press her face against his hair. 

    “You make a man wanna do really improper things.” His voice was quiet but she heard it loud and clear as he lifted a hand up from her hip, sliding it upwards across her stomach. 

    “Yeah but you won’t.” She replied, a teasing tone to her voice. Heavy and hard to the touch, his body moved against hers in a way that left her near outta breath.

    “I won’t?” 

    “Nawl cause then you’d have to deal with my Papa.” He smirked some, mischief sparkling in those deep darkening orbs. 

    “What Pa don’t know won’t hurt him.” She playfully hit him, bringing a chuckle to him. 

    “Quit…” Chuckling, he lifted her chin and kissed her, bringing them to a stop.  In the midst of the sea of brown bodies around them, there they was…just the two of them. Softly stroking her tongue, he devoured her softly uttered moan before letting her free.

    “AW SHIT LOOKIT YOU TWO!” She felt a pair of arms come around her neck. 

    “L-Lily…”

    “STUTTERIN NOW KIRA GIRL? WHEW THAT WAS ONE HELLUVA KISS.”  A becoming blush decorated her cheeks. 

    “Y’ALL TWO A STRAIGHT MESS NOW. WANTIN EACH OTHER KNOWIN Y’ALL CAN’T HAVE ONE ANOTHA.” 

    “And why can’t we Lily Bean?” He asked, licking his lips. 

    “Cause our Papa gon skin you ‘live you deflowa her without marrying her.” Lily had quit yellin but she was more than inebriated, red burnin bright up underneath her freckles. Her eyes had a mist over em and she was startin to wobble a bit. Some random Negro came behind her and started fondling her breasts, bringing a very enraged and surprised yelp outta her. 

    “THE FUCK YOU DOIN? GET OFFA ME!” She said, trying to get loose but he only gripped tighter, yanking her back against him. 

    “Don’t be like that now baby. You can’t ‘pect me to not touch them and you displayin em real nice like.” Before the man knew it, Joon had punched him straight in the jaw, sending him flat on his face.

    “Piece a shit.” He growled, nostrils flared and muscles tight. 

    “I uh… I think we should go now. Fore we get into trouble.”

    “We got us a problem.” Dipp and Scat suddenly appeared, evidently sobered up. 

    “The Klan on they way here. We gotta get the hell outta here.” Scat said, voice panicked.  

    “Fuck.” Joon grabbed her hand.

    “Kira, you and Lily bring any purses?”

    “Nawl.”

    “Let’s go then.”

    “Joon…wait…”

    “We have to go. Now.”

    “Let’s get a move on y’all.” The music suddenly stopped as a lone Negro came running up to the mircophone. 

    “KLAN COMIN! AND THEY GOT DOGS AND TORCHES!” Joon yanked her roughly towards the door and she reached back for Lily, tears starting to well up in her eyes. 

    “You know they good fore burnin whole places down and stringin up every damn body.” She heard in passing as they high tailed it for the door. Joon cursed again as they hit a brick wall of panicked men and women, all tryna get out the narrow door. 

    “ONE AT A DAMN TIME! FUCK!” He growled, tightening his grip on her hand. 

    “J-Joon…”

    “Hold on to me tight now baby. Don’t let go.” Up for no argument, she swallowed and nod, trying to swallow her tears too. Cryin wasn’t gon make a big of damn difference now. 

    “You got ya sistah’s hand?”

    “Yeah.”

    “Good.” He shoved a man in front of him. 

    “MOVE GAWDDAMN IT.”

    “We gon have to fight our way out.” She said, throat suddenly thick as mud. 

    “THEY GOT ANOTHER EXIT JUNE BUG. COME ON.” Scat hollered at them, turnin towards another door, a door hidden by the jukebox. 

    “Let’s go. Now!” He pushed them towards Scat and they struggled against the influx of people like a fish tryna swim up stream. Panting and tired, she forced her feet to move closer and closer to that door. It was small but she knew they’d make it through. They had to. 

    “Lily go first.” He ordered, opening the small hatch. She gathered up her dress and went into the hatch. 

    “Kira.” She went next. Inside it was dark and she couldn’t see a thing. 

    “LILY?”

    “HERE!”

    “KEEP TALKIN SO I GET TO YOU.”

    “COME ON THIS WAY.” She felt hot, sweaty and panicked, her heart rattling against her chest loud enough to hear in her ears. 

    “June Bug?” She called but nobody answered. 

    “Scat? Dipp?”

    “Yeah we here.”

    “Where Joon?” She shouted back at them. 

    “He should be comin.”

    “Joon!” 

    “Keep going Kira. We almost there. I see an openin.” Lily’s voice sounded closer than before. 

    “Dear Gawd.”

    “What is it?”

    “It’s in the forest.”

    “What?”

    “Come towards me Kira.” She crawled for a bit more before her heart twisted almost painfully. 

    “Joon? “

    “Kir-“

    “Where is he? I ain’t goin no more till he in here with us.”

    “Move that big ass of yours before we push it.” Scat growled under his breath, sounding outta breath.

    “Chanjoon!” 

    “I’M HERE SWEETHEART.” He sounded way back like he just got in the tunnel. 

    “WHERE ARE YOU?”

    “I’M RIGHT BEHIND YOU DARLIN. KEEP GOIN. GET OUTSIDE.” Satisfied, she kept going until a pair of cafe au lait hands helped pull her out of the hatch. Looking up into brown grey eyes, she let out a cry of relief as Lily hugged her, her cream dress now wrinkled. 

    “L-Lil yo dress.”

    “Screw the dress! You a’right?” 

    “Y-yeah…” 

    “Good.” The woods instantly provided a cool night breeze and she inhaled deeply as it hushed across her hot skin. 

    “Joon comin out now.” They both turned to see him poke his head out. Soon, he pulled himself out of the hatch and closed it carefully.

    “We gotta be careful not to make too much noise now in case they out here.” He spoke real quiet. They all understood and took a moment to just live in the moment. 

    “You did good Kira girl.” He praised, coming to take her face in between his hands. 

    “I was rough with you and I apologize about that.”

    “Don’t be. We… we had to get outta there.” Kissing her one good time, he reached for Lily. 

    “Lil you a’right?”

    “Yeah. Cold as hell but good. That blew my damn buzz.” 

    “Here Lily take my coat.” Scat said, pulling off his tailcoat. She gladly burrowed inside of it, pulling it closed. 

    “Okay. Let’s get to the car.”

    “Where’d you park?” Dipp asked, lookin around. 

    “Enough away from the place that it won’t be no trouble to get there. Member the walk?”

    “Yeah.”

    “And I’m damn glad I did.”

    “Us too.”

    “A’right let’s get these girls home.” 

    “Sure thing. Ion want they Papa comin for us.”

***

    That night was one of many that happened all across the South. It was never ending and the fear that spread like wildfire crippled the Negro race like a plague. Mama used to tell me that women used to fear giving birth to boys. For boys grew up into men and men somehow always found themselves hung from trees or burned alive, fire and despair all around them. That was also the first and last night I ever went to a jook joint… Somethin about it still gives me chills. It was such a contradiction. The freedom that existed in the swaying bodies, bodies forced into submission during the day. And underneath that freedom the fear that existed right underneath the skin. The Negro could never really truly be free because the white man made sure a very real fear of being stripped of life regardless remained. 

    Thanks be to God in Heaven we made it back to our shack safe and sound. Later on, Lily told me she ain’t neva seen June Bug drive that fast in her life. But once the other two were at their respective homes, Lily had gone inside, damn near freezing. June Bug and I remained in the car, the stars up above shinin moonshine across the ground. 

*** 

    They sat quiet for the longest time, fingers tightly entwined. She took the first look towards him and found that he’d been staring at her the entire time. Feeling her cheeks blush, she turned towards him on the seat. 

    “You real quiet.” He leaned his head back against the top of the seat, eyes still on her. 

    “This whole evenin went ta shit.” She sighed and leaned her head back the same as him, pulling his hand into her lap. 

    “Least we made it out.”

    “That wasn’t an option.”

    “Yeah I know. Daddy woulda kilt you, brought you back ta life and kilt you again.” There, a smile broke through the serious lookin expression on his face. 

    “Yo daddy woulda flayed me like a fish.”

    “Shol woulda.” They shared a laugh before he lifted her hand and pressed a kiss to the back of it. 

    “We ain’t had time ta just sit like this and talk.” She agreed with a nod. 

    “Yeah…” She squeezed his hand. 

    “Tell me what went on in them two years you was away.” He grinned. 

    “You go first lil gal.” Pursing her lips, she playfully snatched her hand back from him. 

    “This lil gal was busy while you was away.” He sat up, balancing his cheek on his palm. 

    “That right?”

    “Yeah that’s right. I got me a job in Mableton.”

    “Didja?”

    “Yeah as a laundress. And on them days when I can’t even think about a washin board, I clean them white folks’ houses.” 

    “I see.”

    “Ain’t no amount of money I make will be able to pay off that raggedy shack…but I wanna help Mama and Papa however I can.” 

    “That’s a real noble thing there Kira girl.” He took her hand in between both of his. 

    “And I ain’t done. I made use of that primer you sent me. Lily helped me to learn how ta read and write. I worked real hard so when you did come back, I’d be smart just like you.” He kissed her hand again. 

    “You always was smart pretty girl. Now you just know what to do with it.” She blushed prettily, biting her lip. 

    “I’m proud of you sweetheart.”

    “Thank you.” He pulled her against him with no warning, drawing a surprised breath outta her. 

    “I hope I make you jus’ as proud.” 

    “But of course you will. You always have.”

    “Yeah?”

    “It wasn’t easy steppin in for Jimmy but you did it Joon. You did it real well.” Looking up at him, she laid a dainty hand on his chest. 

    “You don’t know how you healed Mama and Daddy. They’ll neva tell you but you made em both whole ‘gain.” He smiled down at her and lifted a hand to stroke her shoulder. 

    “Then my becomin a doctor…”

    “They more than proud of you and I am too.” He nuzzled her nose, bringing a smile to her. 

    “I think you be happy ta know I also went up North with Lily in the spring.” His eyebrows lifted and his delight spread in his beautiful dark eyes. 

    “Didja now?”

    “Yep.” She said, puffing out her chest quite like her sister. The sight made him laugh. 

    “You so fuckin cute.” 

    “Yeah yeah yeah wha I tell you bout cursin at me?” He grinned.

    “What city you went to?”

    “Philadelphia! She took me to the historical black sites and I learned that there was free Colored families! Can you believe that?” He looked at her like it was the most inconceivable thing anyone had ever uttered. 

    “Free families of Color? Free Negro families?” 

    “Yep.” She answered proudly, eyes gleaming. 

    “Kira you jivin me.”

    “No I ain’t. I take you up there so you can see fore yaself.” 

    “That’ll be a trip we fa sho gotta take.” 

    “Tagether?”

    “Tagether.” 

    “Kira Burnett!” At the sound of her Mama, she pulled away from him real quick. 

    “Looks like I don stayed out too late.”

    “She jus worried bout ya is all.”

    “Yeah and Ion wont that whippin I got comin my way I don’t get in that house.” He chuckled and got out of the car, comin around to help her step out. 

    “Say June Bug?” He wrapped them big strong arms around her, pulling her flush against him. 

    “Yeah baby?”

    “This yo car?” He smirked some. 

    “Yeah.”

    “Oh…”

    “Oh?”

    “Well…I um… I figured…I mean I was thankin that since you was home and everythang I could go fora drive with you.” 

    “Go fora drive or do the drivin?” He asked with a full out smirk on his face now. 

    “Both.” Chuckling, he playfully lifted her up, bringing a squawk from her. She laugh hollered as he tickled her some, squirming like a worm. 

    “PUT ME DOWN MAN!” She screeched, feeling his chest bob with his deep laughter. 

    “Ask nice…”

    “OH! PLEASE! PLEASE GAWD…”  Her feet met the ground and she took the opportunity to playfully hit him on the shoulder. 

    “You play too much!” He snickered, stealing a quick little kiss from her. 

    “Let’s get you in the house fore Ma come out here and whip you.” Fingers entangled, he led her up to the front porch. 

    “Girl, you ain’t hear me hollerin for you?” The voice of her Mama called by the door, opening before they even got there. 

    “Ma, I’m sorry I kept her out this late. Don’t be too hard on her.” Lifting her up by the waist, he lifted her up onto the porch and gave an apologetic yet charming smile to her mother. 

    “Hm…” Is all her Mama said before disappearing from the doorway. 

    “I’ll come pick you up tomorrow. We’ll go for a ride a’right?” 

    “Mmhm.” 

    “Good girl.” Kissing her collarbone, his gaze drifted up to hers and for a moment, she couldn’t feel her feet. 

    “I love you sweetheart.” 

    “I-I love you t-too.” Finally, he took his hands away from her and he put them into his pockets again. She started to turn and stole a glance at him before scurrying inside, wooden door now in eye view. Licking his lips, he lifted fingers to smooth his hair back from his face. Reaching into his pocket, he struck a match to the cigarette dangling from his mouth, started his car up and hopped inside making it on home.