Wednesday, December 7

It was 6 o’clock in the morning when my alarm went off.

Shitted on ‘em
Man I just shitted on ‘em
Shitted on ‘em
Put yo number 2’s in the air if you did it on ‘em

I turn onto my back and stretch listening to my Nicki mix. It’s a cd full of my favorite Nicki Minaj rhymes. I get out of bed and walk to my closet. I’m not feeling so hot today. It’s Wednesday, or what I call Hump Day. I pull out some black leggings, a long blue shirt, and my black wedges before getting in the shower. My Mom always used to say that when a woman is feeling down, the best thing for her to do is dress up. She always taught me to look good. She said that because I was slightly bigger, people will always find reasons to tease me but if I keep up my appearance that’s one less thing for them to discuss. Let’s get this out there now: My self-esteem is at a low point. I feel fine around my friends and family, but I have my insecure moments, especially around guys. This is junior year and I’ve never had a boyfriend. What if I never have a boyfriend? What if I’m forever doomed to be the fat chick? Or the best friend? I clear my head of these thoughts and finish washing my hair.

I get out of the shower and wrap a towel around myself. I plug in my curling iron and start putting on my make-up. I just put on a little foundation, some black eyeliner, and mascara. I put my leg on the tub side and lotion up. I put on some deodorant and then my clothes. I start curling my hair into big waves and rap along with my Nicki mix still going.

She’s on a diet but my pocket’s eating cheese cake
And I’ll say Bride of Chucky is child’s play
Just killed another career it’s a mild day
Besides ‘Ye they can’t stand besides me
I think me, you and Am should ménage Friday
Pink wig thick ass give em whiplash
I think big get cash make em blink fast
Now look at what you just saw I think this is what you live for
Ah, I’m a motherfucking monster!

I love Nicki because she is not afraid of being who she is. She’s crazy and confident and I love her for it. She’s what I wish I could be. I unplug my curling iron and walk into my room. I gather my bag before walking downstairs and into the kitchen. My brother is already there stuffing his face. He’s older than me by a year, so he thinks he can boss me around, but I love him anyway. He’s very protective. This is my junior year and his senior year. I think he’s gonna have a panic attack when he leaves for college. Our parents, you ask? Our dad is always on business and never around so I think that’s why Bryan is protective. He thinks he has to fill Dad’s place and I might be biased, but he does a great job. And our Mom…….well that’s another story.

“Morning Bry.” I say, putting my stuff on the counter and going to the fridge. I pull out a small salad box and water bottle before setting it in my bag on top of everything so it doesn’t get squished.

“Morning Nae.” He says, scraping off his plate and putting it in the sink. He kisses me on cheek and puts on his black and white letterman jacket. We’re the white tigers. I’ve always wondered why that specific tiger, but the teachers just say it was the founder of the school’s favorite animal. So, whatever floats you boat I guess. He’s on the Varsity basketball team, has been since he started high school, and he’s captain. I know what you’re thinking: ‘Oh, she must be one of those popular uppity cheerleaders.’ Wrong! I’m the quiet sister of the Captain of the Varsity Basketball team. I’m popular in the way that most people don’t know my name, but are nice to me because of Bryan. Anyway, his jacket has “CVB” on the right for “Captain Varsity Basketball”, a basketball on the left, and our last name “Anderson” on the back.

“Are you ready to go?” I ask him and he looks at me

“Aren’t you gonna eat anything?” He asks and I shake my head

“Nope. Now, can we go because we’re gonna be late?” I ask and he looks at me

“Nope. You need to eat something.” He says and I roll my eyes.

“It’s not like missing a meal will kill me.” I tell him and he narrows his eyes at me. He hates it when I joke about my weight. It’s my body; I should be able to say what I want about it. I just grab a pop tart from the cupboard. “Happy?” I ask

“Very.” He says before grabbing his backpack and heading out the house. I follow him and get in the car after locking up the house. Bryan drives a four door Dodge pickup. Speaking of, we’re on our way to pick up our little group. We’re heading to Zac’s house to get Zac, Kayla, and Brandon. Zac and Brandon are Bryan’s best friends and Kayla is my best friend. She is a fiery red head and is dating Zac. We pull up to find them sitting on Zac’s porch.

“Hurry your asses up before we’re late!” Bryan yells and they walk to the car.

“Shut up!” They retort in unison. They all hop in the back.

“Nae, did you finish that English paper?” Kayla asks

“Of course I did and let me guess, you didn’t?” I say, turning in my seat to look at her

“No, but only because I was distracted.” She says, and then kisses Zac’s neck.

“Eww! That is too much info. I’ll show you it at lunch.” I tell her, cringing.

“Thanks, babe. You’re the best.” She tells me leaning over to kiss my cheek.

“Uh huh.” I mumble surfing the web on my phone. “Morning fellas.” I say to the guys

“Morning D.” They say. We arrive at school and get out the car. I put my shades on and link my arm with Kayla. Everyone is always staring at us, I know more so staring at the guys and everyone is more meaning the girls. Kayla and I get to our lockers next to each other and I put my lunch away.

“Good Morning Gorgeous.” A voice says and I close my locker to see none other than Austin Galloway. He is the Co-Captain of the Varsity Football team and the hottest guy in school. His brunette hair and baby blue eyes soften his strong face. He always likes to talk and flirt with me to piss off my brother. They don’t get along at all. Why? I have no idea. He’s a junior and he has AP English with Kayla and me.

“Morning Austin.” I say removing my glasses and a throat clears beside me. I look at Kayla and see her look between us.

“Hey Kayla, how are you?” Austin asks

“I’m good.” She replies smiling at him. Did she forget she has a boyfriend?

“Good. And how are you this fine morning?” Austin asks, looking at me.

“I’m ok considering I’m at school and you’re talking to me.” I say with fake sweetness, leaning on my side against my locker to look at him with my back to Kayla.

“Ouch Beautiful, you wound me with your words. I’m very happy to see you too.” He says, blatantly checking me out. I fight not to fidget under his gaze. I know his purpose is to annoy my brother and it angers me to be used, but the boy is fine.

“I bet. Anything else I can do for you?” I ask, and he locks eyes with me.

“There’s a couple of things. I’ll go with letting me take you to Winter Formal.” He says and I fight a groan. How could I forget?? Next week is our last week before Winter Break.

“No can do. I already have a date.” I lie. I don’t know what the hell I’m saying.

“Who is it?” He challenges, probably seeing right through me

“I’m not gonna tell you. You might harass him.” I shoot back at him and he chuckles while shaking his head.

“One day,” He starts, brushing my hair behind my ear and leaning in to whisper to me. “You’re gonna accept the fact you want me and I will be waiting.” He finishes before kissing my cheek and walking off. I let out the breath I didn’t know I was holding when he leaned into me.

“Damn girl. Home boy was laying it on you.” I hear behind me and turn around to see Chantel. Chantel is my other best friend. She’s loud and dramatic, but she’s my ride or die. Kayla and her are a lot alike. They aren’t afraid of a fight and are always sticking up for me. We’ve been the Three Musketeers since 3rd grade.

“Hey Chantel.” I say, ignoring her comment

“You know that boy wants you Dijnae.” She says

“No he doesn’t. He likes antagonizing Bryan.” I correct her

“I doubt that. He always looking like a thirsty man and you the glass of water and he wants to drink you up.” Chantel says with a slurp and I roll my eyes at her.

“I agree with Chantel. You need to stop playing and get with him.” Kayla says and I shake my head while looking over her shoulder at Austin with his football friends. He really is the hottest guy in school, but I don’t need the headache. He looks up and I quickly look down. The bell rings and everyone starts heading to their classes. He walks by with his crew and has the nerve to wink at me. I just stare as he walks off.

“Our girl is already in love.” Chantel says

“Head over heels.” Kayla adds and I groan

“Lord help me.” I pray before heading to my first period and hoping I survive this day.