CHAPTER 6: A Perfect Day

After making love for the second time, Sam and Tara cuddled quietly under the tree. Sam was flat on his back with one arm behind his head and his eyes were closed. Tara on her side next to him, her leg was slung over his thigh.

There was a light cool breeze. The air was pure and sweet. The birds and crickets sang a melody in the background. The sky was a brilliant shade of blue with not a cloud in it. It was a perfect day.

Sam opened his eyes and saw Tara smiling down at him. He thought how alluring she looked. Like a goddess.

"Hey." Sam whispered with a sexy rasp.

"Hey." Tara replied with a twinkle in her eyes and thought how handsome he looked. She ran her hand slowly up and down his taut abs and chiseled pecs. He was warm under her touch.

He responded emitting a low rumble from his throat. "Hmm..."

Tara liked watching Sam. She always did. Even before she started working for him, she used to drop by Merlotte's just to look at him before going home to dream about him. Now, it pleased her to see that she made him feel good. As she laid naked next to him, a strange feeling came over her. An unfamiliar yet wonderful feeling. This time she didn't feel like running off like she often did every time they had sex. This time she didn't want to ever leave.

"You know, if anyone asked me a week ago if I'd ever go skinny dipping, I would tell them 'no fucking way'. Now, look at me, lying here out in the open, in broad daylight, buck naked and doing things that would make a hooker blush!" Tara chuckled.

Sam laughed then asked, "What made you do it?"

"I wanted you. I needed you, and the moment felt right. Once we started, you know there was no turning back. It felt so natural making love with you in the open with nature as our spectator."

He liked her using the words 'making love' as opposed to her usual, 'fucking'.

"'Nature as our spectator', that's beautiful. I like that." Sam reached up to kiss her.

"Oh shit!" Tara exclaimed, startling Sam.

"What's wrong?" Sam sat up.

"Nothing, I'm too embarrassed to say this" Tara turned her face away.

"Tara, tell me or I'll make you." Sam held her and tickled her sides.

"OK, OK, I'll tell you... but.. don't laugh when I do, swear!"

"I swear." Sam felt ridiculous but held up his right hand.

"I think I came too much."

"Oh Tara, I love it when you come and the more you did, the more I was turned on by it." Sam pulled her in close and kissed the top of her head.

"Yeah, but, you must think something's wrong with me."

"No! Don't ever say that. There is nothing wrong with you. You are perfect." His face was resolute.

"Really? How about when I was moaning and crying out your name? I must have sounded like a cat being stepped on"

"Tara, there is nothing wrong in losing yourself to …., anyway, it's obvious you enjoyed yourself, and so did I. It makes me feel good knowing that I made you feel good. There is nothing I would want you to change." Sam wanted to use the word 'love' as he said this, but didn't as he felt she wasn't quite ready for the 'L' word.

"What we did was so... powerful" Sam added.

"Mind-blowing" Tara reflected.

"Intense" Sam sighed.

"I don't think I've ever felt so..." Tara started.

"Free?" Sam ended.

"Yes! Free."

Without saying another word, Tara got up and promptly got dressed. Sam took it as a 'time to go' signal and did the same. As he sat back down to put on his socks, Tara remained standing and silent, contemplative. She rubbed her forehead and bit her bottom lip. Finally folding her arms under her breasts she asked,

"Sam, did you really mean it when you said that you never stopped loving me?"

Sam remembered saying those words just before they made love, and meant it, every last word. Now, he feared it might have repercussions.

"Yes...yes, I did." Sam waited for the ax to fall.

"What made you keep coming back every time I ran off or chased you away?

"Because no one and nothing else matters. I'll never give up on you, Tara." Sam got up and looked her straight in the face. Tara paused, just blinking her eyes. She moved a little away then shifted about on her feet.

"Sam, did you know that the first time I ever had real feelings for you was when we spoke over shots of whiskey on your porch? I enjoyed talking with you and thought that even if you weren't attracted to me, at least you would make a great friend." Tara's hands rested on her hips when she stood still.

"Yeah, I remember that chat we had. It was the first time I opened up to anyone in months, no, years. I had wondered if you had a boyfriend but when you said you hadn't had sex in nine months, then I was relieved." Sam smiled a little.

"And how did you feel when I talked you into having sex, that same night? I mean, we pretty much became fuck buddies after that. You must think that I'm easy." Tara paced a bit.

"Fuck buddies! Tara, how can you say that! Easy! I never once thought of you as being easy. You are far from 'easy'!" Sam clenched his teeth and tried not to lose control.

"Oh, you prefer if I said, 'friends with benefits'?" Tara snapped.

He refrained from saying another word because if he did it would come out all wrong. He didn't bring her all the out here to have another fight. He wanted to just have a good time and get to know her. Everything was going so well up until now. He wanted her and knew that she had to be willing to have him but just about now she's putting up barriers again. He thought, for once, can't I have something good in my life . They stood staring at each other for a while until Tara finally broke the silence.

"Look, I shouldn't have said that. I...I'm sorry. I like you Sam. I really do. Don't you see how fucked up I am? The more I like you, the more my stupid insecurities come rearing its ugly head. My lack of self-worth and guilt for being happy. I was wrong to push you away. I know I hurt you and I am sorry. Now, I just want to put all of that behind me."

What does she mean by 'putting it all behind her'? Please God, give me a chance.Sam threw out a prayer before calming himself.

"Tara, first of all, you are fucking hot so I didn't need to be talked into having sex with you. That night I was about to ask you, but, you just happened to beat me to it. I have no regrets crossing that line with you. So, unlike you, I don't want to put 'all that' behind me." Sam stood his ground.

"Sam, when I said I wanted to put all that behind me, I meant my insecurities."

"Oh. Good." Sam sounded a little embarrassed but relieved.

"So what does this mean for us? Is there an 'us'?" Sam taking a bold move.

"I know I've been fighting this, but, yeah, there is an 'us'" Tara said with certainty.

Sam smiled.

"And where do you want 'us' to go from here?" Sam asked, pensive.

"Well, I want us to get to know each other more."