It felt as if my feet were placed in a boiling pot of water and left there. The pain screamed at me each and every step I had to tail back to my cabin hid back behind the cotton fields. Today was no unusual day and that beating was no unusual beating. I passed hard, dark working bodies, where they backs glistened in the sun. Afro women had their hair tied up, their faces pint up like emotions never let go. Some backs I eyed the open scars, as if they decided for themselves to flash every passing soul. My insides seemed to churn as I thought repeatedly how I had it better than the field workers. But our lives were just the same. Not one male or female seemed to glance up at me as I fled pass, sucking in the pain of my bleeding feet. No tears dared touch my cheeks, for I knew that if they started they would never stop.

Lady Flores decided to come home today from her round trip to New Orleans. She always commented to Master how it was her dream to go there for a week of shopping, and him being the wuss he was to his wife he let her. I only knew that she had been gone a week, and for the time I had to tend to Sofia I did not count the days that that dreaded woman had to come back. I was still basking in the delight that she was gone. Her angular face and soft brown eyes did not match up to her menacing personality. The Lady that she decided to show to her husband was no woman she decided to show to me and all the other slaves that worked this land and took after the Master. Every time I entered her presence, because I was her daughter’s keeper, her eyes glared and her lips pursed. That lady always had a way of making me feel as if I was the scum of the earth. But I took this treatment as if they wouldn’t a care in the world. I had to; otherwise more than my feet would have been beat.

As I roamed the house with little Sofia in my arms, her drool trickling down my back, I failed to distinguish between the carriages that rode down that had been riding down the main road for the past week and the one that had pulled into the yard. As I entered into Sofia’s room, I intended on putting her down to sleep for her nap but it only seemed she wanted to fight me. Glancing at me sideways, I didn’t realize Baby had her free hand stuck up her dress yanking off her undergarment. As I brought my hand around to stop her, she jacked off my cap and flew from my arms. Lord could only imagine the whipping I wanted to give to this child. Touching at my wild hair momentarily, I eyed as her naked, pale butt disappeared around the door. Grabbing the garment and the cap from the floor I went after her. I checked first in the bathroom, cause that was where little girl’s favorite place to play, right on in there with the tub. She won’t there so next I eyed the stairs, then her parent’s bedroom. I had only been in her parent’s bedroom but one time, and lord knows I had no intentions of going back again. Grimacing, I made my way toward the door but slowly, because I knew when Sofia got quiet they were bad things going on. Peeking round the edge, I almost fainted because there I saw little girl in there in her mama’s closet attempting to sashay round the room. Dodging in, I took no note to scold her, just to grab her and get the Jesus out of there. Touching her hand, Sofia decided to snatch her hand away from mine and giggle, going deeper into the closet. I closed my eyes briefly and started praying. Lord knows don’t let Lady Flores come in here.

“Come ‘ere Sofia. Time for you to get out your ma closet and come on take your nap.” I saw her shake her head no and wanted to strangle her. Grabbing her, I picked her up but felt the sharpening pain of her ma shoe in the side of my back. Kicking off one shoe, I eyed Sofia like she was trying to get me killed. But then little Sofia thought it was funny that her other shoe was on, so she decided to keep it on. Jerking her leg, I could feel the heel of her foot in my back and tip of the remaining heel in my stomach.

“Now look here ‘Fia, you aint gone keep acting out. I said its time for your—“

“Nuria!” Lord knows that struck an awful fear in my heart. Lady Flores was calling me and here I was in her closet with Baby, with her clothes, and her shoes. Watch something tomorrow suddenly become missing. Hearing her feet get closer, I decided not to hide from her but instead answer her. Walking out the closet door trembling, I hoisted the fat girl further up my wide hip. Waiting, watching her, I dipped my head and heard the creak of the door as I flung open. I could hear the intake of her breath, for I just knew she was assessing me, checking for any lumps, not caring to look at her own baby. I felt Sofia wiggle in my arms as I heard her calling for her ma but it seemed the bitter woman ignored her. Cradling her closer to me, I began to feel the tension in the room.

“Nuria, I thought I told you to keep your nigger rump out of my room.” I winced at the derogative word that she addressed me with.

“Ma’m, Im sorry—“

“Look at me while I am talking to you!”  I jumped as my head instantly flew up to meet her condescending eyes. Her nose was slightly flared, with her eyes taking on a crazy look. In that second that she yelled I feared for my life. I remember the first encounter me and her had. Except I was in my own cabin, in my own room, minding my own business.

“Now tell me why you in here in my room Nuria?” I was attempted to shrug out of spitefulness but the lord only knew she was gone strike me where I stood.

“Ma’m she got away while I tried to put her sleep, took off her pamper,” I said gesturing to her still bare bottom that her ma seemed not to pay no mind to. “Then she ran in here Senora, but I swears to you I was trying to get her out as hard I could because—“

Seeing she had lost interest to my excuse, I suddenly jumped as she slammed the door to the room. My first thought was to scream, because me being so little I knew I couldn’t fight off this woman.

“Your shoes.”  I glanced down at my feet and retracted. Baby girl was still in my arms this time instead still playing with my cap sticking from under her gown. Setting her down, I patted her butt so she would get as far away from me as she could. I did not want her to witness this cruelty. I was confused at first but now I recalled the promise Lady Flores had made to me. Told me the next time she caught me in her room, she was going to beat my feet till they bleed. And if I tried to run, she would beat the life out of me. I shuddered as I bent to take off my shoes. From the paranoia, I could feel the emotions running through me making a trail to my feet. It felt as if they already knew what was going to happen. With one battered, torn shoe off I reached off to take off the other.

Before I knew it, I felt the blow to my face and I was falling sideways to the ground. Or so it felt like the ground was coming up to meet me. Landing with a heavy thud, I blinked a few times to access the pain that was now throbbing in my right cheek. My eyes scanned the feared women towering above me, planning for her next blow. Putting my hand to my cheek I turned to my side and slid up the floor, now noticing that little Sofia was hoping off the bed and flying to my side. I shook my head no to her, hoping and praying she would stay on that bed.

“Sit down!” freezing in her tracks, she eyed between her mama and me, and then ran to her mama, slapping frantically at her skirts.

Seeing this as a distraction, I rolled to my stomach, preparing to get up, but instead I heard another thud, and then felt the pain of her weapon coming down to my foot. Screaming out, my body instinctively curled in on itself as my hands reached for my aching foot. I glanced behind me then, but only for a moment as I saw she raised the fire stick up again, the curled iron facing my way.

“Senora! Im sorry—please, please!” Again I felt the iron hitting my foot. Repeatedly I felt my skin peel back slowly. I saw the crazy in her eyes as they was transfixed on my feet. My legs jerked each and every time she brought it down. It seemed my body moved on its own as my whole body began to move in odd ways. My arms flung out, my stomach clenched—with each pounding of my body I felt as if I couldn’t take it no more.

I felt the blood beginning to trickle down my foot, each one just as numb as the other now. I could see her swings getting slower, her ups going slower just as her downs. I heard Sofia crying and I wanted to hold her, and tell her I was alright but I couldn’t move. Panting, I noticed then Lady Flores had stopped. The weapon clanged to the ground and her hand was over her chest. My eyes stood still, wide in shock as I glanced down at my pained feet. They looked as if they decided to do the Boogie Man in stick-a-brows. I could feel the emotions behind my eyes, the tension building, and the headache coming on. I rubbed my cheek and felt it slightly swollen, eyed the tad bit of blood on my finger as I withdrew my hand.

Glancing back at baby girl, I noticed her still on the floor but this time she had stopped crying, her eyes taking on that look that now was the time for her to take her nap. I almost tsked, but then noticed Lady Flores was still there, in that same position holding her chest as if she had had the workout of a lifetime. But her eyes were on me. Not them menacing eyes, but still eyes of disgust. I dared not moved my feet, for I took notice of the weapon still near her. Pieces of my skin lingered on the object.

I shuddered again, waiting for the moment to pick myself up and drag my body out of there. Lord knows I didn’t want to live the rest of my life like this. But gazing into the eyes of her soul, I saw she was no angel.

She was a Monster. I was a Slave. And that was always how that would be.

¥

I had been awake for a while but my eyes remained closed. Some days I always lay like this, like I never wanted to wake up and live this life. And then sometimes, there was that someone at your feet. Tending to your every wound, even when she had no clue you were hurt she was always there. Her nose was always in the air, sniffing you out. Making sure you wont in trouble but at the same time making sure you wont getting into no trouble. She wasn’t related to you, but then again who was on these slave suckers?

Her hands felt like they were dipped into cold water and lathered on my feet. This why I aint wake up, because I knew she was there taking care of me. Wriggling my toes, I tried to smile as one finger slid up the back of my foot. Breaking my lips apart, a sound escaped my lips and I laughed a little. The little sensation tickled me. It seemed her littlest tactics could change my spirits.

“I know you was awake girl.” I finally opened my eyes and began to watch as she scrubbed my feet lightly with the soap and the water from the pail sitting beside her.

“Now Teeti, you know Master don’t want you in here.” Her hands stopped for a second from tending to my feet and her big honey eyes looked to me.

“No, Master rather have me in his bed. But he knows the only time I’m gone come is if I can look after my sister.”

Her words stinged me and at the same time tasted like honey. Nobody in the world, as I recalled of all my eighteen years had ever decided to take me upon themselves and look after me. I was ripped right on from up under my mama’s wings when I was two. Or I was told. And sold to this Cheshire cat named Alejandro Flores. A cotton king of the south who did not care what color his slaves were, as long as his cotton got picked. When I got here, Teeti wasn’t here. Her golden eyes weren’t here to watch my every move, nor was her body here to protect me from my misgivings.

“Teeti don’t say that… but you can stay right?” I watched as her hand dipped back into the pail and she smiled a little.

“Yea I’ll stay—anything to stay and clean your nasty little feet!” I laughed as she began to play with one of my toes.  As her attack stopped, I steadied my feet again so she could finish and wrap them up.

“Your little behind always said that that Aloe wont no good I’m growing in the garden, but we see what you say now they heal your wounds.” I pulled up one side of my nose and told her to hush. A quiet settled between us as I began to play with my hair. The short locks were cut close to my head, like I was one of them white school boys.

“You know what Senora Flores is saying up there in the big house?” I tensed at her name, guessing Teeti felt it in my leg. She patted the slightly raised leg back down and told me not worry.

“You ready to hear this?” That was the one thing that I admired about Teeti. She always took other people’s feelings into consideration. If she knew they aint want to hear something then she aint tell them. Neither did she force people.  Nodding my head, I waited for her to continue.

“Lady wants you out of her house, saying she don’t trust you round Sofia… or in her closet.” I almost groaned. “Told Master she want you gone by the end of next week and he best to make it happen.”

My eye twitched. I was silent for a bit. My first thought was of Sofia. I had been tending to her fat rump since the day she was born. My second thought of Teeti. Then my third thought was of me… where would he send me to? I couldn’t leave Teeti behind. Not that she needed me, but I needed her more. Fear began to creep into my being.
“Teeti…” She seemed to ignore my calling of her name as she finished wrapping up my second foot. Her silence, I could tell meant she wasn’t telling me all of it.

“What else did they say? Well what did Master say?”

My body began to tense and my ears perked. Sitting up, I reached for her but she jerked back from me. Her head was still bowed, as if she was possessed by something on the dirt ground.

“Teeti…” The volume rose in my voice as my heart beat faster. Were they going to kill me?

“Oh lord Teeti, please answer me. Please.” I felt like I was on the verge of tears but I wasn’t crying. I could no longer feel the pain in my legs, but I could feel the anxiety running its way throughout my body.

When she opened her mouth, her dark pink lips quickly closed, the outline a sharp contrast to her dark skin.

“You sure you want to know?” I nodded my head frantically. Preparing myself for what fate was to escape her lips.

“They said—they said you was being sold,” she stood then with her eyes rising to meet mines. They seemed to want to cry to. A pain already there in her chest knocking around her heart. The pain just seemed to seep in mine.

“They gone take me back to that selling block? They gone butter me up like biscuits Teeti?”
I began to back away from her, sliding my plump bottom across the pallet as if she was the thing I wanted to get away from. She stood there still, her eye lids brimmed with tears. I blinked. Refusing to see the thousand years settled within the depths of her soul.

“They gone do worse baby girl—theys gone take you to the Slave Ball.”