You and I

...

"Anger is just anger. It isn't good. It isn't bad. It just is. What you do with it is what matters. It's like anything else. You can use it to build or to destroy. You just have to make the choice."

~Jim Butcher

...

Gravity

......

'Dear Sam,'

Joe looked over the beautiful handwriting, reading Aaron's confession, his story...his sadness, quietly to himself.

'Thank You for all of your help. I may have caused you great pain by doing what I did, and for that I am sorry. You have given me everything I needed, even when Joe wouldn't understand, you did.

Again, I apologize for my selfish actions. Even now I am debating on if I should do it or not. My hand is shaking like crazy...You know how nervous I get sometimes right? Well...I'm nervous Sam, and if I do this I can't get a chance to regret it...it'll be to late.

And I don't know why I'm telling you all of this...Maybe because you need to know what was going through my head. Maybe you'll understand, and you won't hate me like I now Joe will...'

Joe's jaw tighten slightly as he sat down reading the rest of the long letter. He took the time and read the rest of it all day, reading and re-reading, but still not understanding, not knowing why Aaron did it.

That night he didn't shed a tear for his friend, and in the coming week, he didnt even attend his best friends funeral...

.....

"Mrs. Porlin has told me that you have yet to tell her anything about her, but she has told you everything about her. Care to explain why you will not talk to her?"

Joe looked at the therapist with a frown, "The bitch is crazy, all she does is talk about her husband and I have yet to see a damn man in her house and her scrawny, piece of shit son definitely d--"

"Joeseph I will have to ask you to mind your language. Now, I asked you one thing, but you lead off into another topic. I asked about you, and you talk about her." He sighed, "I'll ask again, why haven't you told her anything? Why aren't you trying to get Better?"

"I don't like her...she disgusts me, that's why I haven't told her anything. Who walks around praising their dead fucking husband?" Joe stood practically slamming his fist on the desk. "Someone needs to tell the woman that her husband Is DEAD! He isn't coming back. She is just as worse as me, but she gets pity because she's pretending he's still here!"

"She is not receiving pity Joeseph, she is getting the same thing that you're getting." He said, staying calm.

"And what would that be?"

"Help, Mr. Johnson...and don't envy her because she can show an actual human emotion besides anger."

"At least I'm not walking around throwing a pity party for myself."

"Keeping your emotions inside of you only causes you to have these outbursts that you do."

"Fuck you!" Joe stormed out, slamming the door shut and heading home.

The following weeks though, he still showed up to his appointments without fail....

...

After weeks past by, Cindy invited Joe over for dinner with her, Tom and Sam.

Joe accepted seeing no harm in it.

Now they all sat at the table awkwardly. Mrs. Porlin was the only one who attempted to start a decent conversation. And after a while the awkwardness seemed to fade, until she started talking about her husband, Richard.

Joe frowned, getting a tighter grip on his fork. "With all due respect I'd appreciate it if you'd stop talking about your dead husband." He stated simply.

"Joe!" Sam said, nudging him as she saw Mrs. Porlin's face of shock.

"Don't Joe me. Isn't this what I'm her for? To set her straight? Her and I, we are supposed to be learning from each other." He turned to the woman, "So hear this bitch, your fucking husband is dead. D-E-A-D! Dead!."

Tom stood as his mother started to look frightened, terrified of the truth almost. "Get out Joe!" He went to his mother to calm her.

"Oh, so am I the fucking bad guy again? You're the fucking bad guy for letting her live in her head for so long! When the fuck are you going to tell her that her husband Is dead? She's not five years old! She should understand!"

"Joeseph!" Sam said angrily as she stood too.

"And you know what Mrs. Porlin? One day your son is going to die too! From his damn disease, right in front of your eyes because you're too damn busy playing house with your dead husband to see that your son is miserable, the only thing that is keeping him going is this girl right here...because she's fucking amazing and can do anything...that's why I love her..."

Joe stood as Cindy broke out into a fight of tears.

"You can't speak to her like that!" Sam hissed at Joe, pushing him slightly.

"Her husband died of natural causes. He wasn't murdered." He spoke loud enough for everyone to hear. "He didnt commit suicide, he didnt die in an accident...so why is this woman fucking acting stupid over this? People lose loved ones all the time, but they don't do this...I lost my mom when I was eight and I understood, and I let her go." He turned back to Cindy. "So why can't you understand what death means? My mom is dead, I didn't pretend she was there, I cried for her. But I knew I couldn't have her back, so I left it alone...why can't you do that?" He said a bit softer.

Cindy looked at him.

"My best friend committed suicide, and blamed me for it...and I'm hurt and I'm angry...those are reasonable emotions to feel." He moved toward the door before looking back, "Grief isn't..." He said even softer than before, "I'll see you in tommorow...."

And with that he left.

...

"So you cursed her out?" The therapist said, narrowing his eyes.

"No, I set her straight and let her have the thruth is what I did. Was there cursing involved, yes. Lots of it in fact, but it was for the best."

"Joeseph, you can't just do that! The human mind is a delicate thing! You can't be so blunt and--"

"Hello Joeseph...Doctor..." Mrs. Porlin said as she walked into the room.

"My name's Joe." He said rolling his eyes.

The therapist frowned at Joe before speaking to Mrs. Porlin with a smile. "Hello Mrs. Porlin." He watched her sit down, "And how is your husband today?"

"My husband is dead." Cindy stated simply, without hesitation.

The therapist's eyes widend as he looked at Cindy, then Joe.

Joe gave a chuckle and shrugged to the doctor with a smile, mouthing the words, 'Very delicate' to the doctor.

Joe smiled as he looked at Cindy, maybe all she needed was a push. For someone to slap her on the hand and tell her 'No!'

Of course though, not all of her problems would be solved, because of course after her denial came something else...something even worse...

...

Sam was spending more and more time with Tom, and he seemed to open up to her even more, if that was possible.

"I swear to god if your mom walks in her, I'm going to kill you." Sam laughed softly.

"She's at therapy." Tom smiled, moving down to kiss her chest then the curving line inbetween her breasts. He had her completly naked, except for her bra a panties of course, "And we're in my room,"

"But the door isn't locked, " she said softly, tangling her fingers in his hair.

"You always talk too much when I'm trying to have sex with you."

"You're a cocky virgin aren't you?" Sam chuckled softly, kissing his forehead.

Tom winked at her as he started to unclasp her bra. He pulled it off, taking in the site, this was the first time he had seen her naked. He smiled as she smiled up at him when he started pulling down he panties.

"You're so gorgeous..." He hummed, running his hands on her thighs.

"It's not fair that I'm naked and you're not." She purred softy, pulling at his shirt.

Just as she pulled off his shirt the door opened...

............

I finally updated this! I'm so happy :)

So what do you think?

I mean I know Joe is a jerk, but I think he is kind of being the most realistic about the situation right now.

Um...the only one I feel bad for at this point is the thought of Aaron, ya know?

I think he had it pretty hard.

Anyway I hope you enjoy and review! :)