Chapter 3

"So Henry, where are your groupies?"

My second Pain Killer drink gave me very little restraint. I was still a bit mindful of what I said, but more open.

He lifted his dark eyebrows in surprise while taking sip from his glass of water. He hadn't touched his Pain Killer drink since it came.

"Groupies?"

" Those girls at the club were all over you."

He smiled knowingly, like he knew I was just a tiny bit jealous, but said nothing of it.

"They were just friends."

"Alexis was not just a friend."

"We're friends," he insisted with calm.

"With bonus points?" I asked surreptitiously as I sipped my drink. I can't believe I was asking him all these questions.

"Bonus points?"

"My version of friends with benefits." It's only after I said the words that I realized I was asking a stranger whether he was into friends and benefits. My manners were flying out the window but right when I was about to apologize, he thankfully answered and was not offended at all by the question.

"She's just a friend."

I narrowed my eyes distrustfully. "It's okay. This is the honesty table isn't it?"

"How do you feel about friends with bonus points?" he asked. 

Normally I'd have been offended that he asked me that and we barely knew each other but I was feeling very free that night, so I shrugged."It's fine but I don't know. For me personally I don't have the willpower to go through with it."

"So then you're a relationship girl." He didn't say that accusingly like most men in my age bracket would have done. I didn't blame them because I didn't care for commitment. At least at the moment I didn't.

I quickly tried to explain myself because I didn't want him thinking that I was 'those kind' of girls.

"Not really. I don’t really care much about them and I haven't been in that many relationships," I explained and he nodded. He kept looking at my lips and that made me drink more.

"How many have you been in?"

I always got embarrassed when answering this question. I decided to just be honest, "One."

"Your greatest love of all?" He wore that faint smile that I was beginning to like so much.

"Greatest? More like most painful."

My face was aflame and I began to regret what I'd just divulged to a stranger. Thankfully he didn't make me feel odd about revealing something that made me feel strange and nodded as he looked out at the restaurant.

"The greatest love will do that to you."

I admired his profile as the wind continued to blow his curls about his forehead. 

"Someone has experience," I said. 

He smiled, looking down at the table. "I've put in a few years, yeah."

His voice! It was so deep and raspy, I just couldn't get over how it wasn't what I'd expected. Lord forgive me but when he spoke I just lost it. 

I could listen to him talk all day, I think. And he talked a bit slowly, like he was almost always in a calm mood. 

"How many relationships have you been in?" I asked.

I couldn't remember the last time conversation flowed so easily with another human being. I made sure to keep in mind that I was drinking and that he wasn't the reason. I had to stop getting ahead of myself.

"Serious ones, three," he answered. 

"And your greatest love of all was which?"

"My second."

"What happened?"

He smirked. "That's more than I asked you, Miss Valerie."

I tilted my head. "Got somethin' to hide?"

"We all do. But I prefer, or at least I'm trying to be an open book. I'll just say simply it was a huge mistake."

I nodded and focused on stirring my drink with a sad smile. "Aren't they all mistakes?"

"What?"

It was on the tip of my tongue, but I couldn't bring myself to say it. No matter how drunk I am. I punked out and looked down from his gaze, "I don't know."

"No. Tell me."

A strong feeling went through me at the way he said the words gently. I looked up and his green eyes gleamed with satisfaction when he saw how flustered I was. I didn't want him to think that he could make me speechless, so I grappled with a defensive response.

"Am I being ordered around?"

"I meant you can be honest with me. Say what you really want to say, and not worry about me judging you." He said a with a hint of seriousness while he linked his hands on the table. As he did, I spotted some black markings on his wrist, which made me look at his hands. They were rather large, and for some odd reason that made me blush.

Something possessed me to reach across the wooden table top and pull at his hand. I felt his blazing gaze on me as I pushed up his sleeve and confirmed that he had a tattoo of thorns circling his wrist.

His skin was warm and very inviting. A shiver went through me when I felt the need to touch pull his jacket further and touch more of him but I miraculously kept my composure. I swear I was starting to burn with how much I was drawn to this guy. He had a certain energy around him that made me feel comfortable.

He made me let my guard down without even really trying.

"I was sixteen and dumb," He explained as I gently ran the tip of my fingers over the tattoo. "This was my first. Where's yours?"

I didn't really think about it. I didn't feel like I had to. Without question, I turned around on the bench and lifted my hair off of my nape.

"Ah, pretty," he said when I was sure he saw the letter V done in Georgian calligraphy. I smiled because I really liked the way the word 'pretty' sounded in his British accent. I turned back around gnawing at my bottom lip coyly.

"Creative," he teased and when I stuck my tongue out at him and he stuck his out too and smiled. My heart skipped a beat and only then did I realize that my heart was thudding in my chest. There were only two people who knew I had that tattoo and I'd known both of them for a while. Even my parents didn't know, but what parents wanted to know whether their child had tattoos or not?

The point is I'd shown this guy a part of me I kept private when I barely knew him. Not only that, but I didn't want to embarrass him by making me think I'd dare talk to a guy like him. I guess I "knew my place" in the world.ars.

The thought began to make me retreat. I let go of his hand and wrist and placed them in the safe zone of my lap. I was still buzzing from having touched him though.

"What's wrong?" he asked, surprising me and I looked up to find him a bit concerned. I didn't mean to be so obvious and I laughed nervuosly. 

"Nothing. Hey, let's play the 'give the don't ask too deep questions but give the first answer that pops in your mind game'."

"Haven't heard that one before. Let's play."

I smiled, realizing that he was the type who was always up to have fun.

"Favorite time of the year?" I shot the first question.

"Summers in the Bahamas are great. You?"

"You've been to the Bahamas?!"

"Yeah? Have you not?!" He asked in a playfully judging tone and expression that made me laugh. 

"No! I haven't."

"Your life is incomplete without a Bahamas vacation, Valerie."

I should have been annoyed with how much he said my name after almost every sentence but every time he said it, I felt the strong urge to smile.

"I know I'm just such a workaholic," I looked to the side to show that I was bullshitting and he laughed. "Looking for hotels and resorts and all that, it's just stressful."

"You can stay at my place."

"Huh?"

"I have a condo down there."

"That was so smooth. Way to sneak in that you got it made."

"No. I'm a regular old joe who got lucky."

I stared at him thoughtfully. He had to be around our age but so far from what I heard he seemed well off. Most people in this area were doing okay but we were all still pretty young and trying to figure it all out. He seemed to have it made already. Or maybe he came from old money? Even though I came from a family that was doing well, my parents--mostly my father--always made sure to remind me that the money they attained was theirs and that I needed to make my own fortune.

Maybe he was more successful of a music producer than I knew.

"So you must be a big time music producer then."

He shrugged in a self-effacing manner, once again avoiding eye contact. This seemed to be the only thing he was shy about.

"What songs have you made? Are they really popular?" I asked.

"They're alright," he said flippantly. 

"Is Mr. Henry turning red?"

"Are we still playing the what was it, honest but don’t ask too deep questions game?"

I laughed.

"What's your favorite time of the year?" he asked me, changing the subject and I let him off the hook just this once.

"I like winters in New York."

He scrunched up his nose.

"Snow is…ah, snow," he said instead, trying to be polite with a fake smile that made me laugh hard.

"Oh whatever! Next question," I said with a smile that was hard to write off.

"Boyfriend?" he asked pointedly and I froze as my eyes widened. Henry mimicked my expression then smirked teasingly and I narrowed my eyes at him even though I couldn't help smiling at him. 

"Nope. You?"

He grinned, appreciating my teasing. "Cheeky."

My eyes widened again and I instantly felt self-conscious. I immediately began to feel like yep, it was only a matter of time. "What?"

"Cheeky. It's kind of how we say someone's sneaky or charming. It's a good thing, In this case at least."

I felt so much relief inside but my reaction to making his words negative was what bothered me and lingered. I laughed uncomfortably and picked up my Pain Killer. "Oh." 

"But no, I don't have a boyfriend, to answer your question," he went on even though I knew he could tell I was caught off guard with that word he threw at me. I guessed he was used to Americans not getting his British lingo at times. I decided to let it go and continue the game. 

"Girlfriend?" I asked him next. 

"No."

I nodded. I was surprised then again I wasn't.

"Favorite food?" He asked next.

"Chicken quesadillas. You?"

"I have a bunch. Right now, I have a taste for mother's Toad in the Hole."

At my clueless expression, he elaborated. "It's like …It's a british thing. It's really good."

"And it would be a noble thing to make some for me someday." I tried to stop smiling by sipping from my drink.

"Will do. If you let me."

"I never say no to free food."

We shared a smile and I looked down from him.

"I just said that to be exotic I actually McDonalds french fries. Like, a lot. It's my horrible guilty pleasure of the moment."

I laughed. "Got to love Mickey Ds. Okay, my turn. Favorite song of the moment?"

"Let Me Love You by Neyo. Did you just roll your eyes at me?! I really like that song! What's yours?"

"Somebody I Used to Know by Gotye."

He nodded approvingly. "He's a very talented fella. Favorite time of the day?"

"5 o'clock."

"Why?"

"Cause it's clock out time, duh! Time to head on home from work!"

He smiled and I got butterflies. Ugh.

"Ah, I see. The good ol' 9 to 5."

"Hey don't be mad cause your schedule is irregular."

"Not mad at all."

"I actually envy you. It must be nice to just not have the same thing every day."

"It's fun but it's hard work. Meeting deadlines is horrible. When it's close to deadlines I get about 3 hours of sleep a night."

There was a serious side of him trying to get out, a passionate fire hibernating in his eyes, but he tried to keep it in check. I didn't want to harp him for it because discussing his career seemed to make him uncomfortable for some reason.

"Poor you." I pouted sarcastically and he lifted his eyebrows with a huge smile while nodding.

"You're fun. What about you?"

"Me? I got to get my 8 hours a night."

"So you're not good at staying up all night..."

The way he said it made me squirm, but I pretended I didn't know what he was getting at.

"I'm the resident sloth okay. I can't function on 3 hours unless it's like the absolutely last option."

He simply smiled secretively while drinking his water, like he knew something about me that I didn't know.

"What about you, your favorite time of day?" I searched for something to say. His eyes were bordering on smoldering and I couldn't handle such stares, especially after touching his wrist got me excited. His wrist for crying out loud!

He set his glass down. He then leaned to one side as he fished in his pocket as he looked about the restaurant, then he suddenly stopped. "I think I have a new favorite. It's constantly changing. It just keeps getting better."

"What is it?"

"3:12 AM."

"Why?"

He pointed to the left and I followed his gaze, realizing the clock on top of the stand where food was picked up was what made stop and look earlier It indeed was around 3:12 in the morning and a rush of heat permeated through me when I realized what he was trying to say. With my elbow on the table, I placed my chin in my palm and tried to cover my smile with my fingers.

"Did it work? Did I get you to blush? I think I did. I see a little blush here and there."

I feigned a serious expression although I was going to learn soon it would be hard to compose myself around this mystery Henry guy.

"It didn't work." I tried to say in a steely voice and raised my chin arrogantly folded my arms. "It says 3:13."

Instead of being turned off by my theatrics, his smile widened. "I said it keeps changing cause it keeps getting better didn't I?"

I was feeling weak all over. Damn being human and all these emotions another human being could give you. I know we were just having fun with a little flirting here and there but I could see the burning in his eyes was making me feel all kinds of things inside.

I was royally fucked and I knew after he said he was going to get my guard down I should have hailed that cab a long time ago and just hightailed into the safety of the condo Ella and I shared.

"I-I have to go," I said as I started edging out of the bench. Henry began to slide out too, his eyes playful yet still predatory. I felt an excited rush going through me. I gaped at him and him mimicked me. I shook my head as I continued to try to escape.

"Where?" he asked.

"I don't know. Somewhere. Anywhere. Far away from here." I stood up with my purse in tow but Henry would not easily let me go. He blocked my path, planting both hands on either side of my hips on the table. His warmth and scent enveloped me. I was losing this battle, if I hadn't lost already.

"Want to bury your blushing face in the sand?" He asked as he towered over me. I could see the tattoos on his chest again. He had a nice masculine neck. He was so close I got turned on and excited.

Shit.

I hang my head exasperatedly but nodded in surrender. "Yes. Yes, that's what I want to, need to do."

"Okay come." He took out a hundred dollar bill and then took my hand. "I'll help you."

I looked over my shoulder to where we were seated and then at our linked hands, and at the back of Henry's head. His dark brown curls looked even better in brighter lighting and I had the urge to run my fingers through them, but I was too shocked by the hand holding. I looked about around us. There weren't that many people, but I was confused as to why he was holding my hand in public and not bothered at all by it.

He must have sensed my hesitation, for he turned around and gently tagged me till I was walking side by side with him.

"Are you afraid of sand too?" we were now walking down the steps of the boardwalk to the white sands.

"What do you mean, too?" I asked dumbly. I was still confused, just floating in the clouds where my butterflies seemed to have taken me. His hand felt so good around mine.

"Well when we were at Chasers, you were afraid when I said hello. Afraid when I bought you the drink. Afraid when I tried to stop you from falling to your doom. Afraid to speak to me when our drinks returned--"

"Shush. I'm not afraid. Just apprehensive of strangers like any other normal person."

"You are now holding the stranger's hand."

"I have alcohol in my system. It doesn’t count."

"Right. Oh look what we have here."

Ella and Peter weren't too far off from the boardwalk so we met up with them quickly. They were running around playing with a neon colored beach ball and as much as I couldn't stand Peter I appreciated the fact that he made Ella so happy. 

"What are you guys doing?" I asked.

"We found an abandoned volleyball. You guys against us. Here's the line" Peter began to draw a line on the sand with his foot. 

"Looks like we don’t have much of a choice, partner," Henry said to me.

"Let's show these guys how it's done," I said, surprising both him and myself as I took off my heels. I wished I hadn't agreed to play when Henry took his blazer off. There were more tattoos up his arm, and while they were much more than I usually liked, seeing them on him nearly made me faint. He looked good with them. There were more on his left arm than his right, and a muscular arm it was. He wasn't overdrive buff, but he was muscularly lean enough to prove that he took his physical health seriously. He had nice sized biceps that weren't too big or too small.

I suddenly felt something light hitting the corner of my head. Holding my head, I turned to find Ella laughing her ass off at my plight. She'd thrown the volleyball at me. I'd been staring at Henry that hard. Oh god, it had reached the point where the world around me didn't exist when I looked at him. That was not good.

"Pay attention!!" she shouted.

"Oh I'll pay attention all right," I got the ball and when I tossed it up, I missed after it fell back down for my hit. This sent everyone into a fit of laughter because it was clear I was too tipsy if I couldn't hit a ball that was right in front of me.

I grabbed the ball and threw it at Henry who was bawled over laughing. It hit him on his bowed back.

"You're supposed to be on my side!" I wailed to him, trying hard not to laugh myself. 

He responded by grabbing the ball and tossing it at me. Somehow, I missed, and Peter laughed hard at him. I grabbed the ball, threw it to Henry, and watched him retaliate as he hurled it at Peter who caught it and flung it to Ella, barely hitting her.

This turned into a game of ball tag. All four of us had fun, latching onto the last years of our young adulthood, or at least whatever was left of it. We were soon over playing and Ella and Peter ventured off into their own direction. As they walked off I chose that moment to appreciate our surroundings. It was such a beautiful night. The ocean waves were crashing onto the shore with a full moon overlooking the expansive beach and the salty smell of the ocean around us.

This was definitely a time I'd remember for a while. It made me a little bit sad.

"Are you alright?"

Henry's voice surprised me and I looked at him I hadn't. He was standing with his hands in his back pocket. His windblown hair was sexily all over the place. His thin shirt rippled and his necklace clinked due to the fairly strong breeze.

"We're getting old," I said.

"When's your birthday?" He asked and the question made me balk up for reasons I'd rather not think about.

"June 8th. 1986"

"Why'd you say it like that? Do you not like your birthday?"

"You're too observant, Henry," I said with a small smile.

"I am," he admitted as he began to walk towards me. "That's almost two weeks away isn't it?"

I shrugged and looked back at the ocean, ignoring the way my heart galloped when he began to near. "I'll be twenty-seven this year."

"Try turning twenty-eight." He was standing beside me now watching the picturesque ocean with me."Why is that such a bad thing to turn twenty-seven?"

I hesitated, but this thought had been weighing on me so much and I hadn't really confided in anyone about it. I knew most of it was me just mopping around, but it was weighing too heavily for me to ignore as of late.

"I missed out on so much. Now I feel like it's almost too late."

"Why did you miss out on so much?" Henry had sat down. I looked down to find that his knees were raised, and he put his weight on his elbows as he leaned back. I sat down beside him with my legs crossed.  

"I worried too much about dumb stuff when I was young. I cared what people thought about me, so I never partook in the fun things people do in high school or college. No prom blah blah blah. Didn't do much spring break. It's stupid I know. And no I'm not feeling sorry for myself, just kind of thinking."

"You were protective over yourself?"

"I had to be."

"Why?"

This is where I normally stopped revealing too much about myself. "I just met you."

He sat up and rested his arms on his raised knees. "And meeting you has been one of the most fun experiences in all my years on this planet. And I've been to many different places and met many different people but I never quite got the same feeling with them that I'm getting with you." He looked squarely at me. "It's weird."

My heart began thudding loudly again. I began to panic. Not because he was freaking me out but because I felt the same.

My panic made me defensive and I stood up and began dusting my sandy behind.

"I know there are not any other options but please don't consider me an easy lay."

He looked confused at first, then smiled as he looked down at the sand, then picked up a broken shell that was by his boot."Original."

"What?"

"You go to the 'I think you’re an easy lay because I'm actually listening to what you're saying' because you think that I think that you'd be so impressionable to fall for the first guy who asks you 'are you okay' instead of me just being genuinely interested in why a woman with so much spirit would hold herself back from her best years, no prom, blah blah blah, etcetera. You didn't strike me as the cliché type, Valerie. I gave you more credit than that."

I was too stumped to speak. He tossed the shell and stood up, facing me as he pushed his hands into his pockets.

"But, your story is yours to tell. I wont pressure you to give me any details. All I can tell you is you can't get that time back, but you can focus on, 4:04 AM and make the following minutes the best you've ever had so that you can say, I may have not had the time of my life in my teens, but on that Saturday morning at about 4 o'clock I had the most fun I'd ever had in my entire life and you can treasure it instead of lingering on a time you'll never get back."

I was rendered speechless. Even if these were some new pick up lines, I couldn't deny them. I couldn't shun them. I took heed to his words. That's what I did before with our 'honesty' and I had a blast, didn't I?

As if reading my thoughts, he slipped his fingers around mine. He was patient about it, one finger connecting with mine, and then another, all the while looking warmly into my eyes.

"No prom?" his hand now encased mine. He pulled me to him and while looking down at me, he took hold of my other hand and said, "Let's give you a prom."

My knees nearly buckled as waves of euphoria swept through me. I couldn't deny him now. I gave in and allowed him to hold me. He smoothed his hands up the curves of my hips to my waist. Deep down inside I was as panicked as I was also exhilarated. He was touching parts I detested about myself but we were both lucky I was intoxicated enough to where it didn't bother me as much as usual.

I lay the side of my head on his chest with my hands flat against his stomach, which was nice and firm. He had a few packs going on which was always a good thing.

"I'm probably getting make up on your shirt right now."

"Don't care."

"What song are we dancing to?" I asked, smiling against his chest.

"Our heartbeats," he said laughingly and I threw my head black to look at him in disbelieve.

"That was good wasn't it?"

When we were this close I could see how long his lashes are. Hell, they were longer and finer than mine. Screw him for being so beautiful.

"If this were a book, I'd throw it into a pit of flames at this moment."

I loved how he'd always smile whenever I teased him. He was such a good sport.

"Did you want to throw the book when I said my favorite time of the day?"

"Almost but it was still really sweet of you to say."

"Good. As for the song, well, what's your favorite slow song?" he said as he fished in his pocket.

"Ummm, I don’t know." I rested my head against his chest again. He was just so comfortable. That was my defense mechanism against looking him in the eye.

He sighed exasperatedly and drawled out my name in his deep, raspy voice. "Valerieeeee." The vibrations I felt on his chest against my face sent an exciting tingle through my body. "Work with me here."

"Surprise me. You pick."

"Okay. Just one moment."

I bit my lip to keep me from smiling at this moment that felt so special. I was so geeked.

"Okay, you ready?" He'd shoved his phone back in his pants and his hands were back around my waist. The tunes of Spandau Ballet's True began playing and I smiled in appreciation, snuggling closer to him.

"I like this one! Good choice."

"Why thank you, me lady," he said into my hair and it was my turn to sigh exasperatedly.

"You need to work on your charming techniques. You're  like, so1800s."

I felt his smiling against my forehead as he wrapped his arms around my waist fully, drawing me closer. I giggled and put my hand over my mouth.

"Oh god! I giggled! I fucking giggled!"

He laughed, his chest shaking against my face. It was so comforting. "What's wrong with giggling?"

"It's so girly!"

"Well, I hope you're a girl."

I laughed and we danced, swaying lightly from left to right but not particularly paying attention to rhythm.

"Okay, the question game continues. What age did you have your first girlfriend? Am I asking too many questions?"

"Yes."

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I was 6."

"Really."

"It's honesty weekend, is it not?"

I smiled at his playfully offended tone.

"My first I guess kind of serious girlfriend, I was 16. I've had many unserious ones, and they started at 6."

"Early bloomer, you are."

"Yep. How old were you when you had your first boyfriend?" he asked.

"You'll think I'm a freak."

"I'd still like you, Your Freakiness."

"I was…twenty-four."

"I see."

When I tilted my head back to peer at him, he shrugged.

"What? Am I supposed to ask you why or what was wrong with you? Because I don't think anything is wrong with that. Now that I'm older I think those kids that didn't get into anything serous early were the smarter ones."

I eyed him skeptically, but was comfortable enough to wrap my arms around his neck. I'd always been so self-conscious about doing this, like I made the guy uncomfortable, but when I saw the excitement streaking through his eyes, I felt so good. I felt so..oh god don't god, don't hate me for this, but I felt…wanted. And pretty. And desired.  I hated that it was taking another guy to make me feel like this. I should have felt like this on my own but…in all good honesty, I didn't.

Just as I started to feel good though, like every other moment in my life, I began to feel self-conscious, but thankfully Henry cut into my thoughts.

"I mean, let's look at all the insanely successful people in the world. They were focused on being successful, not relationships."

"But successful at what cost? You have everything but at the same time you have nothing."

"I don't think Bill Gates thinks that right now. I think he's pretty content. Mark Zuckerberg seems to have everything. David Karp's doing pretty well for herself."

"Mark Zuckerberg, David Karp, and Bill Gates. Those are the worst examples you could use. I don't consider them human beings. Let's just say that some people just have it better than others--Ugh," I started bumping my head frustratingly against his chest. "Damn it. Damn it. Damn it."

"What?"

"Being Negative Nancy again. She's like my alter ego. I'm really trying to shake her, I swear."

"Alter ego. Huh? Is this the part where I run in the other direction?"

I tilted my head back to look at him, readjusting my fingers along his nape and enjoying the way his curls tickled my skin. "You know I was wondering when you were gonna come to your senses. Haven't I dropped enough hints? You should be on the other side of the beach right now."

"Hints about what?" he was looking at me again with that questioning glance. I began to notice that he drew his eyebrows together, causing a small crease in between his eyebrows. This expression of concentration made me feel like I was the only person in the world who mattered. Usually when the focus was on me, something negative normally came out of it. I began to get nervous and changed the subject, replacing my head on his chest.

"Did you go to college here or Britain?"

"You're so not good at smoothly changing the subject. I never went to college."

"Oh."

"So when will I see you again?"

The question made me pause.

"It takes you that long to come up with an excuse?"

"Yes, please give me a minute."

His smile widened and he shook his head, murmuring under his breath, "You're horrible."  

"I was going to go the, I have a boyfriend route but I just told you I don’t have one. Then I was going to say I'm focusing on my career but we both know that's bullshit. Then I was going to say I'm taking to someone when I usually just talk to the chair in the morning before work cause no one else is in the house."

"Maybe I don’t want to see you again..." he said jokingly in suspicion.

"Ah ha! Acting crazy worked. Wooo!!!"

"Do you want to see me again?" he asked and he was serious despite the warmth in his eyes, a warmth that was turning into a burning fire. I began to panic. What kind of player was this guy? I mean, how persistent could he be? We both knew I wasn't really his type. For all I knew he was trying to prove to Peter that he could get me, the most unbreakable woman on earth. I knew my thoughts would annoy most, but I felt a little bit offended, not happy that he'd want to see me again. Time and experienced proved to me that I just wasn't a catch worth keeping. I was the girl people wanted to test drive when it was dark outside and anything went cause everyone was drunk. He wouldn't even speak to me after the fact. He made me horny and yes I had my desperate moments but I wasn't that desperate.

"No. Just your dimples," I tried to make light of the situation, trying not to show my hurt. It's like he knew I was drifting away because he held on tighter.

"How will you see them again without me?"

My breathing was beginning to be labored. I was losing control. NO no no, he didn't want me for real. He was just…what was the reason that I couldn't see him again?

Whatever he was doing to me made me quickly go for his face to kiss the indentation on his cheek. I finally accepted that I was obsessed with his dimples which is what made me do something so spontaneous and out of character. Or maybe it was in my character, I just never felt like I was allowed to do something like that.  

He turned his head to kiss me but I moved my head and buried my face in his shoulder.

"Bollocks! You're too fast for me."

"Bollocks? You said bollocks! That's so cool."

"So impressing you with a word I rarely use but is still considered very British worked. Nice. I know what to do from now on."

I buried my face in his chest, "You're sneaky, or shall we say, cheeky. I like cheeky."

"Then cheeky it is."

We stood this way for a long time.Another song was playing from his phone right now. I closed my eyes and listened to the ocean waves.  It felt so perfect. 

"I don't feel like moving right now." He said into my hair, his voice quiet and slightly above a whisper.

"Me neither," I responded, my voice just as quiet. I think I was shaking a little bit. What the fuck was this? I was fucking shaking?! What a punk I was! But the feeling he was giving me was so strong.

"I think we just found our new favorite time of the day, don't you think?" he shifted as he got his phone and the music went off. "4:40 AM." He returned his phone back into his pants. As he spoke I could hear the smile in his voice and I damn near died on the spot.

He was really good.

I had to stay on my toes, although it was getting hard.

"Should we stay like this till we shrivel and die?" he asked and I pulled back to gape at him.

"That is so morbid. Is Negative Nancy rubbing off on you--"

His lips landed on mine gently and I froze. We both stayed this way until he gently plucked on my upper lip, and then my bottom lip, creating sweet quiet kissing sounds. While all this was happening, his fingers pressed firmly into the waist that I hated so much, but surprisingly didn't scare me off. Next he realigned his lips against mine, pressing them gently and pulled back soundlessly, pressing his forehead against mine

The kiss was very innocent and subtle and sweet but it had all the sirens inside my body. My heart was slamming against my rib cage and my fingers were clutching onto his white t-shirt, probably stretching it and ruining it.  

"I should thank Nancy. She just scored me a kiss with you," he murmured throatily. 

My mind drew a blank. He chuckled and rubbed his lips against the tip of my nose.

"No running away? Didn't I say anything's possible earlier?"

"Do it again," I said breathlessly before I came to my senses and he looked down at me in pleasant surprise.  "Hurry. Kiss me before I come to my senses."

He wasted no time. His lips were on mine they weren't cautious or mindful as they were before. His hands left my waist and cupped my face as he gently pried my lips apart with his tongue. The warm, wetness not only made me gasp and turned my legs into jelly, but it made my fingers urgently curl into his shirt. So urgent that I gently scratched his chest through the thin material. He seemed to like his, groaning low in his unusually deep voice and I sighed at the arousing tingle that gave me. As if that wasn't enough to drive me mad, he titled his head at the same time and successfully pierced through my lips and showed he still had some kind of mind not to be overbearing, and only gently rubbed the tip of his tongue against mine. I made an unintelligible sound which when I think about it later made me feel so weak but I was helpless, the sound came out of me without any control. He was so gentle yet so curious and it was all turning me on something so fierce, unlike anything I'd ever experienced, that I began to convulse even just a little.

Shocked by my reaction to him, I stiffened and took a drastic step back as I pushed him. He too, was breathing laboriously through now pouty, dewy lips. He looked to be in a daze, blinking incessantly while combing his hair out of his hair away from his forehead.

"G-Goodnight Henry." I stuttered as I grabbed my shoes. "Or--uh--g-g-goodmorning. Since it's uh, 4 something in the morning..."

"Valerie--" he touched me to stop me but I reacted like I'd been scolded and stumbled back.

"I'm not going to have sex with you or do you any favors. That's all this is, that's the only thing that makes sense it doesn't make sense for you to treat me like this I mean there were prettier girls at Chasers than me. That friend of yours Alexis was prettier and skinner than me and let's not act like you're not too fucking out of my league so what you're doing right now makes no sense and it's suspicious as hell. It was fun, you're an amazing kisser, and you're so fucking cute I mean, your style drives me crazy and your charm is off the meter and I wish I was a bonus points kind of girl so I could appreciate you but I'm just not built for it. Thank you. And goodnight."

I quickly turned  from his stunned expression and hurried away, the sounds of  towards Sea Burger where Peter and Ella were seated.

They were so into each other and whatever they were talking about, they only noticed me when I was a few feet away from them.

"I'm ready to go," I told Ella decisively. By the tone of my voice Ella knew it was a done deal.

"Come on, man?" I heard Peter behind me but didn't care. I continued down the board walk. 

I was standing by the car putting on my shoes when I realized I'd left my purse on the beach and cursed to myself because I had to go back and face him after that excruciatingly embarrassing, dramatic exit. Well, my license was something I couldn’t leave so I had to go back. Just as I turned to go back, hoping that Henry wouldn't be there, I saw Ella approaching me with a concerned expression. I sighed with relief when I saw my purse in her hand.

"You left your purse. Are you okay? Your face is red as fuck." She asked concernedly as she handed me my purse.

"Yeah. I'm just ready to go."

After a suspicious glance, she went to her side of the car. Soon we were peeling away from the parking lot and the feeling of relief I thought I would be feeling was not coming.

"What happened? He said you were really upset. You okay?"

"No. No. No." I gritted my teeth and growled frustratingly. "Fuck. What did I do?"

"What did you do?"

"You know what? He probably thinks I'm crazy which is good. That's good. He'll stay away for sure now."

"What happened?"

"Who am I kidding? I probably would have never seen him again anyway, just like that last guy."

"The guy from the bar like six months ago? Really Val? We need to find you a new therapist cause clearly Dr. Samson aint doing a good job."

"And even if I slept with him, that would be it. I like him too fucking much for that to be it."

"What happened???"

"I mean I would do the friends with bonus points thing if guys didn't just toss me after using me. You know the thing about me, guys don't even want to just be friends because they don’t want to be seen with me in broad daylight, so it's not like I could say, hey let's just be friends after fucking."

"WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?!"

"We kissed and I freaked out." I immediately cursed because that was not something I wanted Ella to know. 

"Oh my god Val! OH MY FUCKING GOD!!" she exclaimed and completely ignoring the part where I freaked out.

"Shut up. SHUT UP!" I buried my face in my hands when I remembered how fucking majestic the kiss was. 

"This is a huge deal!" Ella said excitedly.

"Nope." I tried desparately to erase the image of his eyes hair arms but was failing. 

"He is a dream," Ella went on. "And he's super rich! And he's young! He's just…ah he's perfect. I told you. Your prince!"

"The only Prince I ever refer to in life is one of my favorite singers and no, I know what his end game was and I didn't give it to him so he was mad."

"He was mad?"

"No! Not mad. Disappointed. No, I don't think he was disappointed. I think he thought I was crazy in the end. Anyway who cares. I wasn't going to sleep with him and I know that's what he wanted. That’s what all guys at the clubs want."

"You like him," she continued to ignore my words. This was a regular conversation between Ella and I. 

"No," I insisted. 

"You do. You only freak out like this when you really like a guy."

"No I don't."

"Yes you do. You act like you hate it but it's because you're panicking. And you're fucking going off the rails now. Yeah. You reaaaally like him like, whoa."

"Nope. I was drunk. He was…" When I remembered he hadn't touched his Pain Killer, I cursed to myself. He wasn't drunk. "He was…adventurous. It ends there. He was probably trying to prove something to Peter."

"I hope you gave him your number." She completely ignored my comment about Peter. 

"I didn't.Thank god."

"What?!" She muttered a string of curse words. "Did he give you his?"

"Nope. Not after I scared him off." I sighed with relief and just expended all my body weight on the passenger's seat. "Thank god."

Ella opened her mouth to speak but she was speechless. She glanced at me at a loss of what to say or do and looked back at the road.

"Ella, I love you, and I know you are excited over drive because no one has heard me complain about the plight of being the token unattractive friend in the group, and you're glad that someone of his…caliber would pay attention to someone like me, but you don't have to do this. I nipped an awkward situation in the bud quickly. Imagine the laughter or disgust on his friends' faces when he says he kissed someone like me," I shivered. "Don't hype the situation up. It didn't matter. It was just fun. I'm smarter this time--"

She hit the steering wheel with both palms before clutching onto it. "For fuck sake Val!"

"And no one is ever going to use me again," I continued, trying to convince myself that I did the right thing.

"Sometimes I wonder how it feels to be your own worst enemy," Ella, at her wits end, said. "But you know what, I wont do this. Not now. I had a great night. I wont raise my blood pressure. I will let you continue to live in your imaginary world of self-hate. But let me tell you something. You have let a fucking good catch go and I pray you regret this for the rest of your miserable life!"

I was surprised by all her ire but knew at the end of the day Ella just wanted me to be happy from what I'd been through. But I felt she should have understood my position since she'd known the battles I'd had all my life. The only reason most people didn't know is because I begged her not to share them with anyone. Her loyalty forced her to keep my secrets.

"If I wasn't so head over heels for Peter," she continued, seething. "I would be all over all that British goodness not wasting a damn second. Henry is a good guy. A gentleman--"

"He probably has friends with bonus points--"

"So does every other normal 25 year old and up Val get your head out of the fucking clouds for once! You're being so fucking annoying right now you know that!"

"I know I'm being annoying and sorry I'm not like every other normal 25 year old and up."

"Oh woe the fuck is me! You know what, you deal with that shit.  I'm not dealing with it today, Valerie."

It had been a long time since Ella referred to me by my full name. I knew I'd really upset her, but I was fairly upset myself. I was still wired up. I could still feel his lips on mine and his hands on my waist.

I felt beautiful then. But I felt disgusting now. And that made me feel sorry for him. 

"Thank you," I said to her as I folded my arms and lay my head against the window pane while looking out.

The rest of the car ride was silent. Not even the music was turned on. Yeah, she was pretty pissed.

I sighed and closed my eyes in regret and embarrassment over how I dragged not only Ella in the mud with me, but also Henry, a complete stranger.

Maybe this was why I was all alone. But I told myself I'd done the right thing. I'd saved myself before it was too late.

I knew I was being immature, but it's only because I was panicking.

Hasn’t fear been known to be a natural reaction to the unknown?

People fear things they don't understand. I couldn't understand what was happening to me.

I had never felt all the emotions swimming through me, and it wasn't the damn Pain Killers.

It was Henry.

And I didn't even know his last name. There's an honesty question I should have asked. 

I was just glad that I would probably never see him again.