I kept my head down as I passed through the hallways trying my best not to call any unneeded attention to myself.

Be a locker, be a locker, be a locker. 

I chanted my mantra over and over in my head hoping not to receive any glares or have any confrontations occur before school even started. I looked around the empty hallway and let out a soft sigh. I made it. Things were going better than I hoped.

“ Where do you think you’re going, nerd?”

I cringed as I was slammed into the locker I was so desperately trying to be. I tugged on the hem of my shirt glancing up as my hood fell forward a bit more on my head.

“I just want to go to class, Camden! I don’t want any trouble, just let me go to class.”

“Who says I’m trying to start anything?” He snootily replied as his friends cackled behind him. 

His blue eyes stabbing me with their intensity.

I let a deep ‘woosh’ expel as my cheeks deflated. I brought a shaky hand to rake over my hooded and hidden face. Barely being able to keep my hand steady enough to reach my eyes. I squeezed my eyes shut and dropped my hand from my eyes.

“Just do it,” I said in a calm voice letting the numbness wash over me. “Do your best, Camden. You and your pack of fucking hyenas. Just make it quick. I can’t be late to class again because of you. I refuse to be.”

I leaned against the locker waiting for the inevitable hits to start raining down on me.

“You refuse, like you have a choice? Oh no, I know you didn’t think it was going to be that easy. I am going to get you when you least expect it. I hope you’re ready, cunt!” With one last rough bump, Camden and his pack strolled off down the hallway.

I let my head fall back against the locker as a lone tear streaked it’s way down my cheek. I hastily wiped it away with the back of my palm. As much as I hated feeling scared at school, it was my sanctuary. This was where I knew what would happen. This school would be the key to the lock and chains that held me down. 

I was living in a world that had the latch on the outside and I was stuck within without a key. My education would be the key to get me out of this hell hole. I’ll be damned to hell if I let some abusive asshole keep me here when I know I am meant to fly. I kicked myself off the locker and hitched my bag up onto my back and scurried to the restroom across the hall. I slapped a handmade ‘Out of Order’ sign on the door, courtesy of yours truly, before I entered and checked under every stall. 

Satisfied that I was alone I walked over to the mirror and let the sink support my weight as I leaned into it. I let loose a sigh as I slowly pushed my hood back and looked at my face in horror. 

“Oh. Oh. Ohhh no.”

I let out a soft wail as I tenderly brushed my fingers over my face. It’s not as if I was ever really able to see the caramel color of my skin, but I at least was able to see a bit of it at times. Today I just happened to get the worst of the worst. I was able to block my eyes but every other part of my face was swollen a blue-black color. I was desperately afraid to undress and see the remaining damage. My hair was matted and kinky. I fumbled into my knapsack and grasped at my brush, quickly yanking it through my hair. Some-what satisfied, I pulled it to the back of my head and placed my hood back on. I adjusted my baggy sweats and tugged at my sweatshirt. 

This would have to do. 

I made sure that the shadows covered enough of my face. I lost this time but it by far wasn’t the worst that I had gotten. 

I mustered up a smile and exited the restroom taking my ‘Out of Order’ sign with me. I slinked into class just as the bell rang and pulled the necessary items needed out of my bag and tried to pay attention.

I closed my locker as the day came to a close and began to make my way towards the front of my school. I was making my way down the stairs when I heard someone yell, “Gotcha’ BITCH!” 

I felt a hand roughly shove me. Before I knew it I was tumbling down the concrete stairs, clamping my lips together and forcing all sound to stay within me. I felt each and every single bump letting out my own internal screams until I found my self rolling on even pavement. I slowly stood up to see Camden and his buddies standing at the top of the stairs laughing loudly along with other students who had witnessed Camden’s violent behavior.  Camera phones were aimed at me as they snickered at their newly attained footage. To them this was fun. My humiliation and my pain was something to be laughed at.

Shake it off. Shake it off.

 I straightened up and held my head high and dusted off my clothes. I refused to give him and his cronies the satisfaction of seeing me in pain. They can beat this body until it is battered, until it is unrecognizable, but they cannot harm my mind or my soul. It belongs to me and me alone. 

I walked away struggling to conceal the limp that would surely reveal itself when I was no longer being watched. I walked away from the school and began to make my way home. I began to mentally prepare myself for what awaited me at home. Despite all the pain that has been inflicted upon me today, I had to pull through all of this. I needed to pull through this. Losing would not be an option today, my body has endured enough. I stopped in front of my house and stared at it warily. Welcome to the hell, the only way to out is in a body bag with a non-existent pulse. I hope you enjoy your stay. 

Taking a deep breath I put one foot in front of the other and made my way towards the front door.