When she woke up, her cheeks were wet with tears. Her chest felt heavy and throat tight. 

    “Gammy?” Turning her head, she found Tangie girl standing there off to her side, arms behind her back and face full of concern. 

    “Y-yeah baby?”

    “Why you cryin?” Lifting shaky hands to her cheeks, she brushed the wetness away. 

    “It’s nothin baby. Nothin at all.” The girl wasn’t buying it. 

    “Is it about June Bug Gammy?” Lifting her eyes, she met the girl’s. 

    “How you know who dat is?”

    “You talk about him all the time.”

    “Do I?”

    “Mmhm. He was yo first love.” Sighing heavily, the woman turned away from Tangie, eyes focusing on the cream floral wallpaper on the wall. 

    “You miss him don’t you Gam?”

    “Every day apart from him jus kills me.” Feeling the girl’s arms come around her, she closed her eyes and took comfort in the warmth. 

    “Let’s pray one day you can meet him again Gammy. One day you will.” She didn’t say anything, eyes fixed on that wallpaper. But her lips slowly started to smile. 

*** 

    As quickly as I had come, I now had to leave. The trip to New York had come and gone and with it came highs and new journeys. With only two or three days left in the city, Joon had taken me to the New York Harbor to see the Big ol Green Lady with that massive torch in her hand, lighting up the way for the people. He’d taken me back to the Savoy and we’d gotten lucky enough to see Billie Holiday and Ella Fitzgerald in one night. Having spent the night dancing, we’d collapsed once we’d come back to the private train car that I’d come to cherish. He’d held me close against his chest, his heart beating strongly against me. His warmth always lulled me into sleep, his kisses against my forehead increasing the love I felt in my own heart.

     As the train pulled into Chicago, it crushed me knowing that I had to go back home. Call it young love, young passion and desire and I would agree with all of the above. I’d been forced to be without him every year and I simply wanted to stay with him. I didn’t want him to let me go. 

*** 

    She stood inside of the train station, tightly clutching her hands together. A deep pain pulsed in her heart and she tried swallowing it down. She never much liked the fact that he had to leave her. But now… now she full hated it. Hated the fact that she was now in the position where she had to part. Licking her lips, she looked up as June Bug started back for her, carrying her trunk. He didn’t look too happy either. 

    “I gotcha all checked in sweetheart.” She pouted, eyes dropping to her trunk. 

    “I don’t wanna go.” Sighing heavily, he reached for her hand. 

    “Why we always gotta leave each other huh? Why can’t we just be allowed to stay tagether?” His eyes were somber, an expression she didn’t see often. It made the pain in her heart increase. He pressed a kiss to her palm before taking hold of it fully. 

    “I don’t want you to go either Kira girl.”

    “Then don’t let me.”

    “I promised yo daddy I’d send you home and that’s exactly what I’m gonna do.” She let the pout fall away and took in the multitude of eyes that seemed to cut into her. White..Black it didn’t matter. They were all starin at her…at them. The North provided many freedoms that she’d never have experienced back home. They did things differently. They talked different. Moved different. Everythin was a rush and everybody seemed to have an attitude. It wasn’t sweet, slow and steady like back home. 

    Lifting eyes to his, she swallowed the pain in her chest and reached down to grab her trunk handle. Even so, even with the differences…at least you didn’t find black bodies swinging from trees and blood instead of water providing the soil with misery and death instead of nutrients and life. 

    “Fine.” He didn’t say anything for the longest time, instead pulling her against him flush in a tight hug. He didn’t care about the stares or the judgements and that both unnerved and reassured her. 

    “Be good while I’m away hear?” She nodded against his chest and felt his lips brush against her nose. 

    “Train 1045 is departing for Atlanta, Georgia! All passengers may now board.” She felt her eyes well up with tears but she held them back with a sniff. Pulling away from him, she swallowed thickly as their eyes met. He gave her a brave easy smile.

    “You’ll see me again now. Don’t be like that.” 

    “I will if I want to.” She retorted, response bringin a small grin to his face.

    “There’s my feisty little girl.” Before she could say anything, he gently took her face in his hands and pressed a kiss to her forehead. 

    “I love you.” Her heart near leapt out of her chest and she let the tears she’d been saving fall free, eyes wide. At her surprised silence, his easy going grin spread.

    “You know, it’s mighty mean to not say it back.” That seemed to quick start her heart again and she felt her face flush with intense heat. Taking a deep breath, she reached up to place her hands on his chest, on that strong beating heart of his. 

    “I-I love you too.” Face still in his hands, he kissed her forehead again, longer this time before forcing her chin upward to catch her lips. She stood on her tip toes, fingers clutching his shirt. 

    “Train 1045 departing for Atlanta, Georgia! Passengers board now! Second to last call for Atlanta, Georgia.” Pulling away from her, he licked his bruised lips and slipped his hands away from her into his pockets. 

    “Best be gettin on now.” Biting her lower lip, she swallowed thickly and gathered her trunk. 

    “Hurry back home you foolish man.” At his smile and playful wink, she began to head towards the platform. One of the porters came to take her trunk from her and she glanced back at him. He stood still, eyes intensely set on her. 

    “Miss?” The voice of the porter brought her back and she forced herself to look away as he ushered her to the Colored section. Stepping into the car, she came to sit next to a couple and their child who was wailing. 

    “Hush boy.” The woman said, coming to pull him against her chest. As she listened to the boy cry, she tightened her fingers in her lap. Now it was time to get back to reality. The dream had been nice but now it was time to be in the real world again. As the train took off, her heart reflected the sorrowful cries of the child and she too wept. Silently. 

*** 

    “Momma, I brought you somethin to eat should you be hungry.” 

    “Thank you Addie girl.” Her daughter smiled before placing the bowl of warm soup and fresh bread down on a portable table in front of her. 

    “You’re more than welcome.” The two women sat on the porch, both quiet and reflective. 

    “Momma,” 

    “Yeah baby?”

    “I think the girls found your journal.” That brought a reaction she hadn’t been expecting. Them grey eyes, normally cloudy and distant grew clear and bright. 

    “Good. They should’ve.”

    “You…You’re okay with that?” 

    “I ain’t neva talked about nothin. Not even to you. Member you had to find it yourself to find out.” Addie grew quiet. 

    “It’s somethin I kept from everybody. From yo daddy. From you.” Taking a shaky breath, the woman looked oft into the distance. 

    “How do you think I felt? Havin to keep him a secret? Hell, if I hadn’t a wrote it all down, I’d be an took it to my grave.”

    “So you wanted us to know then Momma? Know about him?”

    “Why of course. In case y’all ever found y’allselves in the same position. Don’t get me wrong now Addie girl. I loved yo daddy. That I did.”

    “I never doubted that at all Momma.”

    “Good then.”

    “There’s nothin wrong in admittin that you loved Chanjoon more. Your heart was always gunna be his and that’s all there is to it. Not even Daddy could compare or come close to him. That’s alright.” Tears began to well up in those eyes, remarkably still clear. 

    “This era is so forgivin.”

    “Yes…it is isn’t it?”

    “Those girls are our future Addie. They have to learn to not waste this generation’s freedom. They have to learn to love whoever they want because they can. Love who they want and run wild with it. Neva look back and neva apologize.” Addie turned to look at her mother whose eyes were starting to grow cloudy again. 

    “Agreed Momma. Agreed.” 

*** 

    “So you continuin the readin today or am I doin it?” Saffron eyed an excited Kotani and rolled her eyes. 

    “Girl, you as excited bout them books as you are bout this journal?” Tani huffed with a childish pout. 

    “Look here, I passed my last test.”

    “Yeah but what about this upcomin one in math? You been studyin for that?” At her sister’s silence, she reached over and grabbed the book from her hands. 

    “And on that note, I’m readin. The whole time.” That pout grew deeper. 

    “No fair.”

    “Till I see you study for that test Ion care bout bein fair. You gotta take your studies seriously now Kotani.” 

    “You know Ion like math Saffron.”

    “Don’t matter. You think Gam would be wastin time like this had she been given the opportunity to study like you? At that, she sobered up. 

    “Why you say it like that….”

    “Cause it’s true. Why you think Mama been so tough on us to do good in school? In Gam’s day girls like us wasn’t thought worth educatin.” 

    “Okay okay okay! I study for the test!” Havin guilt tripped enough, Fronnie sat back real satisfied and opened the page they’d marked. 

    “Good. Now then, I’ma start.”

***

    Having been bent low in the cotton field, she lifted a hand to wipe the sweat from her brow. 

    “Mama, why don’t we take a break?”

    “We gotta quota to fill Kira. We can’t stop now.” Eyes watched as her mother stooped low, she swallowed thickly. 

    “THAT YOU KIRA?” Turning towards the voice, she screeched suddenly, startling her Mama. 

    “LILY THAT YOU GAL?” A big grin spread across her lips and she quickly stuffed the cotton she’d picked into the satchel and shot towards her, nearly tackling her in the process. 

    “Dear Gawd my heart be still…it’s you Lil…” Her brown grey eyes twinkled and she nestled her close to her bosom. 

    “It’s me. The one and only Lilian Burnett.” Releasing a cry of joy, she began to cry, soaking her sister’s dress. 

    “It’s good to have you home Lily girl.” Their Mama said with a smile, tying her bag of cotton behind her back and coming from the fields. 

    “Good to be home Mama.” Lily said, coming to draw her into her arms. 

    “I’ve missed you. All of you.”

    “Come, let’s go inside and take a little break. I gotta git back to the field here in a lil while.” 

    “Yes ma’am.” Sitting the bag of cotton down by the entrance, their Mama took her time climbing up onto the porch, sounds of exertion making the sisters eye one another. 

    “I make y’all some ice tea. On a day like this we could use some.” 

    “Yes ma’am.” They left their mother in the large second room and opted to go into the smaller bedroom, the one they had shared. Upon entering, Lily smiled. Her side hadn’t been touched and it looked the same as the day she’d left. 

    “Still the same.”

    “Of course. This always be home for you Lil.” She said with a smile, sitting down on their once shared cot. 

    “And damn is it good to be home I tell ya.”

    “Tell me how everythin been for ya.” Lil came to sit next to her, pulling her feet up comfortably. 

    “Well, I just finished up my last year at college.” She squealed and hugged her sister. 

    “Yeah and how was it?”

    “It was incredible sistah. I learned so much while I was there. Aside from the home economics and sewin we had to take, everything else was great.”

    “They made you take cookin classes and sewin?”

    “Yeah and homemakin. That’s all fine an dandy but I wanted to learn more of the stuff like the men at Morehouse was learnin.” 

    “Of course.”

    “Mama been taught me how ta sew and cook so that was a waste of time.”

    “Lil…” Her eldest sister huffed and crossed her arms. 

    “I got into so many clubs Kira it ain’t funny. Book clubs, music clubs, archery club…hell I even pledged to a sorority.” Her eyes grew wide. 

    “A sorority? What is that?”  Lily smirked. 

    “A sorority is a sistahhood of women gathered round for a unified cause.”

    “Oh yeah?”

    “Yeah and I found my place with Delta Sigma Theta.” She looked more than confused and Lily could see it, opting to give her a hug instead. 

    “Tell me what’s been happenin here since I been gone?”

    “Ah…well you know Mama and Daddy still croppin.” Lily’s face grimaced. 

    “I see that. It’s a damn shame they can’t just enjoy the shack they worked for. That cracka increased the taxes didn’t he?”

    “Every year.”

    “Bastard.” 

    “My concern is that Mama and Daddy gettin older now. You saw how hard it was for her to get up onto the porch.”

    “She been wearin her body down for years and it’s finally startin to catch up to her.”

    “Yeah.”

    “It’s all a buncha horse piss of you ask me.” Sighing, Lily leaned back on the cot, folding her hands underneath her head. 

    “How June Bug?” At that her entire face lit up like Rudolf’s nose, bringing one of those cheshire grins from her sister. 

    “H-he’s um…he’s up North. Been up there now two years.” 

    “Somethin happened while I was gone didn’t it?” Lily sat up, grin growing wider. 

    “Lily quit now.”

    “What happened Kira?”

    “Nothin.”

    “Don’t lie. That just admits somethin did.” She said with a low chuckle. 

    “Okay fine… h-he took me up North wit him two years ago.”

    “Where to?”

    “New York.”

    “Mmhm and?”

    “And what?”

    “If you don’t tell me you know I’ma find out from Mama.”

    “No! Mama don’t…don’t know.”

    “Is that right?” She asked, eyebrow lifted and grin growing more obnoxious by the second. Licking her lips, she took a breath. 

    “He um…he asked Daddy if he could um… court me.” Lily’s arms came round her real tight and she screeched like a chicken in a coop. 

    “FINALLY! THANK GAWD IN HEAVEN.”

    “LILIAN BURNETT. KEEP IT DOWN HEAR!” At the yell from their Mama, the two women bust out laughing. 

    “You bouta get a whippin already and you ain’t even been home but a day.” 

    “Well…” 

    “Yeah…so we been um… courtin this entire time.”

    “Well good. I’m glad he was man enough to ask Papa. Seems he got the okay to take you up North too.”

    “Mmhm.”

    “Anythin else happen?” There, that blush grew furiously. 

    “Um…well…”

    “Spit it out girl.” She took her sister’s hand and pressed it against her chest. 

    “He touched me here.” Lily’s eyes near bugged out of her head and her mouf dropped open. 

    “June Bug? OUR June Bug?” She didn’t say anything, just clutched her sister’s hand and laid it on her lap. 

    “Was he gentle Kira?” Her sister’s question was serious this time and she watched intently as she answered quietly, 

    “Yeah. He was.”

    “Then why do you look so sad? Did he try anythin else?”

    “No…we ain’t have time I mean… I was only there fora coupla days.” Lily’s gaze didn’t waver and she knew she’d have to explain more.

    “I ain’t sad Lil. I’m…I’m mad as hell.” At her curse, Lily blinked in surprise. 

    “He ain’t…he ain’t come home yet. It’s been two years already.”

    “Has he contacted ya?” She nibbled her lips. 

    “Yeah he has but you know I can’t read.” Lily balled up her lips. 

    “Where is it?”

    “What?”

    “The letters he sent you?” Sighing, she got up and went to retrieve a small package he’d sent her. Still wrapped real pretty like in the expensive lookin paper, she handed it to Lily who in turn opened it. 

    “Oh my.”

    “What is it?” She hurried back over to the cot, watching as Lily’s eyes scanned the writing. 

    “Says here that the trip went longer than expected.” Pursing her lips up, she stayed quiet as Lily decoded the neatly written manuscript. 

    “He misses you. A whole bunch.”

    “That right?” A sudden grin fixed itself on her sister’s face. 

    “He say he wanna hold you ‘gain like he did on that train. Dreams bout it.” At her teasing gaze, her cheeks grew warm. 

    “Seems he don finally made you a woman huh?”

    “Lil quit.”

    “You say you ain’t give him yo honey pot yet but trust me it’s comin. He gon be on it like a fly.” She hit Lily on the shoulder, tellin her to hush. 

    “Quit I said!” Cackling, Lily continued to read the latest letter from him. 

    “Oh this good here! He sent you a primer. He wants you to learn how to read Kira.” Her heart soared in her chest. 

    “He says he wishes he could be here to help you start learnin. Says he wants you to be careful and hide it in case the white folks suspect anythin.” 

    “Can you teach me how to use it Lil? Please?” She smiled and for a moment put his letter down. 

    “Of course lil sistah.”

    “Thank you.”

    “I wasn’t thankin cause I be an taught you way before now had I had my brain on straight.” Turning eyes back onto the letter, Lily smiled again. 

    “He says that reading and writing are forms of freedom. And that for as long as he can, he’ll exist in them with you…even if it’s in private.” Fiddling her fingers, she bit her lip in a smile. 

    “He says that he doesn’t know how much longer he’s gonna be away but that-” Lily suddenly screamed, wiggling on the cot like a worm after rainfall. 

    “Girl hush and finish up!” 

    “He says he LOVES YOU and that he can’t wait to see you ‘gain.” That melted her heart into a pile of mush and she let the smile that had been blooming on her face come out in full, cheeks warm. 

    “I always knew y’all two was gon get tagether. Y’all was always too damn close. Always up underneath each other.”

    “Lily…”

    “Nah nah…it’s the way it’s meant to be and we all know it. Don’t be mad at him now girl! He love him some you. And I for one support this thang y’all got goin.” Eyes found the primer. 

    “He really tryna teach you to read and write. Most Negroes don’t know how to read and if they do, they damn sure ain’t tryna teach their women how to. They wanna keep us in the dark, keep us ignorant so they can have some sense a power over us.” 

    “Hm.”

    “So I tell ya what… we gotta make sho when he come back, you know how to read and write. Simple as that.” Putting the letter down, she grabbed the primer. 

    “You wanna start now?” She asked, starting to fiddle her fingers again. 

    “Now is as good a time as any.” 

    “GALS! ICE TEA READY!” Their Mama called from the kitchen, bringing a smile to Lily. 

    “And while we’re at it, we’ll teach Mama too.” 

*** 

    Tani smiled, glancing down at her bookbag which she’d strewn carelessly in an attempt to get to their Gam’s journal. 

    “Now you see what I was talkin bout?” Fronnie asked, gaze scolding. 

    “Yeah yeah. I get it. We more fortunate than Gammy was and we can’t waste what we got.”

    “Right.”

    “I do better in school. I swear I will.”

    “I holdja to it Tani.”

    “You gon keep goin?”

    “Yeah hold on.” A piece of aged brown paper spilled out of the entry, attracting their attention. Lifting it up, they took in the shaky uneasy letters written in pencil, now faint on the paper. An A. A B. A C and so forth all the way until G. They could tell Gam had gotten frustrated because the tail of the G was dragged off of the paper. Taking it in, they both giggled. 

    “Gammy really tried didn’t she?”

    “Yeah she did. I’m proud of her.” 

    “Now I see why she hounded Mama so hard. Comin from nothin….she wanted Mama to have everythin.”

    “Mmhm.”

    “I’m ready for the next entry. You ready?”

    “Been ready Fronnie. You jus been talkin too much.”

    “Girl hush.” She playfully swat her before grinning. 

***

Nineteen Hundred and Thirty Eight 

Spring

    Shoe clad feet hurried on the dirt road, kicking up small plumes of dust as they moved. Sun hot and air humid, sweat already was slipping down her back. But she had to hurry or else she’d be late. There in the distance stood her sister, a small trunk beside her. 

    “Come on now Kira!”

    “I’m comin!” She full out ran until she finally caught up with Lily. 

    “Good. Now this here is Michael Calhoun, Archie McAllister and Paul Jones. They come from Atlanta…from Morehouse.” She blinked, taking in the three quite attractive Negros, two high yella and one brown skinned. 

    “Nice to meet y’all. I’m Kira…Lily’s younger sistah.”

    “Nice to meet you too. Your sister asked us to come help y’all get to the train station.”

    “Oh?”

    “Yes ma’am. It’s mighty dangerous around these parts for pretty girls like yourself so it’s the least we can do.” She smiled some. 

    “Y’all sweet on my sistah ain’t y’all?” The two yella ones blushed a pretty rose color and the brown one red. 

    “It…It ain’t like that.”

    “Okay.” But her tone said she didn’t believe it.  

    “Kira be good now.”

    “I am bein good. I ain’t said nothin mean.” She shot back with a small chuckle. 

    “Think we should be heading off now ladies.” The one named Michael said, stuffing his hands into his pressed trousers. 

    “So we will.” As the other two grabbed their trunks, they helped the two women into a vehicle. 

    “Y’all headin up to Philadelphia?”

    “Yes.”

    “Hear it is real nice up there this timayear.” 

    “Oh yeah?”

    “Mmhm.”

    “Well, I’m takin my lil sistah up there for a good enough reason.”

    “That is?” The brown skinned one asked, cheeks still red. 

    “I wanna show Kira the history them crackas don’t want her knowin. They got up North people of Color jus like us that ain’t come from no slavery.” The two high yella ones didn’t look surprised but the brown skinned Negro did and his eyebrows shot up all the way to Neptune.

    “Stop jivin me Lily.”

    “Ain’t no jive. Maybe you should come wit us. Learn somethin.”

    “Philadelphia’s a good place ta start Lily.” She nodded towards one of the other Negros. 

    “I think so too. And it ain’t gon get no closer we continue ta sit here and talk now come on. Git us to the train station.”

    “Yes ma’am.” Hey eyes took in the receding plot of land she’d called home and sighed, twiddling her fingers. 

    Over the course of that next year. she’d gathered up her gut and found work in the neighboring town of Mableton as a laundress and domestic. What she earned was not nearly enough but she did it to help her aging Mama and Daddy, trying in her own way to repay them for all they’d done… thank them for all the times the white bastard felt too good to say so.

    She thanked her lucky stars she had finally learned to read and write and felt damn proud of herself for doin so. The years before her seemed like a vast dark ocean, thunder storms and lightening all around. But within a book, any book held a light that shone brighter than any lighthouse. It cut through the darkness, the humiliation and the ignorance that the poor Negro society were faced with every day.

     Cutting eyes over to her sister, she watched as she got Mistah Archie McAllister together as his fingers tried to skim their way across her shoulder. Lily Burnett had always been a fireball and that wasn’t ever gon change bout her. She’d always been outspoken and defiant and loud, somethin that both drew her praise and disapproval. But all in all, Lily wasn’t bout to change for nobody and she respected that. Glancing down at her still twirling fingers, she grasped them tight, stopping their movement.  Now more than ever, she felt like she was starting to come into her own. Sure, she was the quieter one of the two sisters and she felt more drawn to the traditional ideals of femininity than Lily did….but that didn’t mean she couldn’t too be fierce…outspoken…educated and smart.

    “Whatchu thinkin bout ol Kira girl?” Lily asked with a grin big as the moon on her face. 

    “Thinkin bout what we gon do in this city up North.”

    “Lots sistah gal. Lots. The menfolk head up North and enjoy themselves so why can’t we?” She agreed with a nod. 

    “You saved you some money right?”

    “Yeah. I kept me a lil bit. I ain’t fixin to spend a whole bunch.” 

    “Well I fore one is. I’m thinkin a bringin Mama a nice dress, a table and two nice sturdy chairs for her and Papa to sit in. It ain’t becomin to be sittin on the floor all the damn time. It’s 1938 for Gawd’s sake. We should be sittin down at a table like all the resta civilized folks.” 

    “Mm.”

    “And fore Papa I’ma git him a nice pair of leatha boots. Some slacks and suspendas that ain’t worn… have em lookin real nice for Sunday service.”

    “You got all that money to spend Lily girl?” Her sister just grinned. 

    “I got my pouch yea I do. And don’t ask me how I got it cause it ain’t nunya bizness.” She started laughing. 

    “Girl you sound like ol Jimmy.” Lily chuckled, turning into a soft smile as she swallowed, her eyes too finding the trees they passed. Her fingers reached for hers and they gripped each other tight, the ride turning quiet and reflective. 

*** 

    “How old was Gam in 1938?” Tani asked Fronnie, glancing at a picture of their great aunt Lily who stood against an old car, hand on her hip and grin just as big as she’d imagined. 

    “She was 21 years old if I did the math right.”

    “And June Bug?” Fronnie hummed for a bit before answering. 

    “25.”

    “Ohh.”

    “Yep.”    

    “I wonder when they gon see each other again. I’m bout to get anxiety thinkin bout it.” 

    “Now hold ya horses Tani girl. I’ma get to that part.”

    “Will you?”

    “Yeah but only if you promise not to eat alla Gam’s peach cobbler tonight after dinner.”

    “Aw Gam made the peach one?!”

    “Yeah and I know yo gluttinous behind fixin to eat it all.”

    “No I wasn’t but since you gave me the idea…”

    “Don’t you dare Tani!”

    “I save you some girl don’t holler.” Fronnie pursed her lips. 

*** 

    Nineteen Hundred and Thirty Eight 

Summer 

    “Kira?” 

    “Yeah?”

    “What they sayin?” The two sisters stood outside the shack, clutching their dresses nervously. 

    “I think he talkin bout Mama.”

    “Can you hear what he sayin?”

    “Nawl hush up so I can try to.” The two pressed their ears against the window, thanking Gawd and high heaven that it always remained cracked. A doctor had been called while they were away and they found the door closed when they’d returned from the store. 

    “So, what you’re sayin is that I got a disease?”

    “Yes ma’am…unfortunately.”

    “Is it curable son?” Their father asked. The man took a long deep sigh. 

    “Right now I don’t know. I ain’t gon lie to y’all. Y’all know that’s not me.”

    “We know baby.” The two glanced at each other. 

    “Why they talkin like they know one anotha?”

    “Girl hell if I know.” 

    “Fore nah let’s keep a monitor on it.”

    “You back now?”

    “I plan to be yeah.”

    “Well that’s good now. Sure the girls gon be real happy to see ya.” Lily almost broke her neck to look at her. 

    “Whoever that is inside know us.” She felt her fingers grow shaky and tried to peer inside the window but all she was was the back of the man, clothed in a white coat. He had their mama’s hand in his. 

    “Yes ma’am. They out and about?”

    “Her and Lily should be back right bout now.”

    “I see.”

    “Stay put. Sure they’ll be comin up in a jiffy.”

    “Alright. Well, I think I’ma step outside for a smoke if that’s okay.”

    “Of course baby.” The two women pushed away from the window and watched as the wood door to their shack opened and a pair of feet covered in good leather stepped out. Her breath clamped shut in her throat and Lily gasped loudly. 

    “J-Jung Chanjoon that you?” A pair of surprised moon shaped eyes found them and flickered between them before settling their destination on her. She shot towards him and damn near tackled him, knocking the small pack of cigarettes from his hand. 

    “Oh my Gawd it is you! Where the hell you been? Kira and I been so worried bout you!” He wrapped arms around her and held her tight, finally taking his gaze off of her. 

    “I’m sorry Lily Bean… really I am.” 

    “That’s not good enough. You know she been waitin for you this entire time. And you ain’t even had the decency to write another letter to her.” Guilt flushed his features but before he could say anything, their mama and papa came out onto the porch. 

    “Gals! We was just talkin bout y’all!”

    “Yeah we came home early and found y’all talkin to a doctor.”

    “You mean this doctor?” She’d wrapped arms around herself, quiet, eyes tryna find somethin other than him to look at. As excited as she was to see him… she was also mad as hell. 

    “Kira ain’t you gon say somethin to him? He came all this way to see you.” The sudden anger and hurt that had been building up for two years forbid her to open her mouth and instead she let her legs carry her away from the house. She ain’t stop to see who said what or what was said. 

    “Joon, I’m… I’m sorry bout her. I don’t know what’s gotten into that girl.”

    “It’s okay.” Reaching up, he pulled the pristine white coat off. 

    “I’m gonna go after her. I be back.”

    “Okay…” Lily took his coat in her arms. 

    “You got some serious apologizin to do June Bug.”

    “I know.” 

    “Gon git to it now. She couldna got that far.” He shot off into the same woods she’d drifted into, his heart damn near about to come out of his chest. 

*** 

    “So he became a doctor?”

    “Seems so.”

    “That’s awesosme!”

    “Yeah…he did what he said he was gunna.”

    “But even so… I don’t blame Gammy for bein mad at him. I mean… he ain’t write her or nuthin?”

    “He was workin hard both on them Pullman cars and in his endeavors to become a doctor Tani. The man may not have had time.”

    “Nawl nawl nawl.”

    “Even with her bein mad at him… somethin tell me Gammy forgave him every time he made her mad.”

    “Yeah…they was that in love.” 

    “Tell you what. I’m bout ready to eat. We been up here all afternoon and I can all but taste Gam’s peach cobbler.”

    “Mmhm I know you can fat butt with five stomachs.” Kotani laughed, playfully shrugging. 

    “Hey don’t be mad at me cause I like ta eat. Can’t be helped.”

    “Hmph.” Marking the place they left off, they began the descent down from the attic when they heard a deep male voice in the front part of the house. 

    “Mrs. Peterson-Bisset, may I have a word with you?” 

    “Who that is?” Tani asked, grabbing hold of Fronnie’s wrist. 

    “Don’t know but let’s find out.” Feet quietly carried them into the hallway where wyes watched as a doctor pulled their Mama away, face and voice serious.

    “What you think he tellin her?” Tani asked her sister. 

    “Somethin bout Gam. I just know it is.” Fronnie answered, tone quiet as she tried to listen to the lowly muffled voices. 

    “Gam?”

    “Shh!” Kotani shut up and the two tried to listen in, only catching bits and pieces. 

    “She’s worsened health wise ma’am.” Their mother swallowed thickly and glanced towards the sunroom where they assumed Gam was. 

    “I figured…honestly.”

    “Yes ma’am. It seems that her dementia is starting to worsen. Her lungs have grown weak and her heart even weaker. Being 94, her immune system is at its weakest state and…”

    “So what are you sayin Doctor?”

    “I’m saying that she needs to stay inside from now on. Any virus that she catches will compromise her entire system and she will…”

    “She will die if she steps foot outside?” The doctor nodded, expression grim. 

    “Yes. The threat of even a small cold and she will perish ma’am.” The two looked at each other, fingers tightly grasped together. Their mother sighed heavily and reached up to hug herself. 

    “I…I thank you for coming out to see us today. She didn’t eat breakfast and I grew worried. Her not eating ain’t like her.” The doctor pat her shoulder as if to comfort her. 

    “I reckon you will have a lot more days like that moving forward Mrs. Peterson-Bisset. In the time she has left, just be there to comfort her and surround her with love. I’m sure that’s what she wants most.”

    “Yes sir.”

    “I should be going now but should anything else arise, please don’t hesitate to give me a call hear?”

    “Yes sir.” 

    “Good then.” 

    “Gammy…Gammy’s…gunna die?” Kotani asked, voice soft and sad. Unbelieving. 

    “She’ll live if she stay inside.”

    “So we have to keep her inside to keep her livin?” Fronnie swallowed thickly and gripped her hand tighter. 

    “Yeah and that’s what we gon have to do.”

    “Right.”

    “Girls! Come on here! I gotta talk to y’all bout somethin!” 

    “Come on, let’s go.”